Character Academy
by KatofFlorida
Summary: Spin-off of A Day in Therapy by StFangofBoredom! Read it! And this!
1. Chapter 1

Character Academy

Me: Heylo! I was bored on fanfic and, of course, what better place to look for things to cure boredom than…. STFANGOFBOREDOM!

Finn: Wonderful.

Me: And I came up with an idea based off of A Day of Therapy Center….

Finn: And as all fanfics must do….

_**Disclaima!: **_I do not own anyone from Twilight, Harry Potter, Kingdom Keepers, Percy Jackson, or Lord of the Rings. Except Finn. I kidnapped him.

Finn: Hey!

Me: I might quote Saint in here. BEGONE, SATAN!

Finn: She laughed for ten minutes after that.

Me: And also….

_**Special Thanks to…**_

Saint and Fang over in New England! (In the U.S.)! I thank you for the special idea of my school for fictional characters! So I don't want to plagiarize your awesome story 'cause that would call for lawsuit.

Finn: Who would you pick as a lawyer?

Me: … Melvin the Purple Bunny Rabbit or George the Redcoat.

Finn: Why Melvin?

Me: Well, he's incredibly cute, good for persuading a jury, and really argumentative when needed.

Finn: What about George?

Me: He was a lawyer before entering the Revolutionary War.

Finn: Ah…

Character Academy

_Kat's (Me) POV_

I scribbled down my signature on the paper. I had to sign the papers and other crap. When you're a principal, you do lots of weird things. My glow-phone rang and I pressed the blue button.

"Yeah?"

"Kat? You're needed in room 30B. Kronos is trying… to… enslave a chair," Mr. Brunner's voice said through the phone. I sighed and took one last look at my papers before shoving them into my desk. As I walked out, I went past my secretary, Taffy.

"Another emergency, ma'am?" He asked, typing furiously at his glow-pad.

"Yeah, Kronos needs more counseling," I sighed. "Email Dionysus and tell him to meet me in 30B."

"Okay, good luck," he said. I went up the stairs and walked inside room 30B.

"You shall obey my every will! I command you!" Kronos hollered, flinging the chair about the room. And even worse, Luke was encouraging him.

"Enslave it. You can own the chair. Own it!" He said silkily.

"Make him stop," Poseidon begged.

"Or I will," Zeus added.

"Please," Hades said, rolling his eyes.

"Destroying people is not rational," Athena reasoned.

"Well if they're not cute, I say get rid of them," Aphrodite applied lip gloss.

"I'll squash 'em," Ares pounded his fist into his desk.

"Love is good," Hera said dreamily.

"Boys are nothing," Artemis growled.

"Ahem ahem," Apollo coughed. Everyone groaned.

"_Kronos is trying to enslave a chair. Everyone is running about here or there._

_I like to rhyme what I'm thinking. Zeus' pen is constantly inking."_ Zeus shook his pen angrily, spattering ink everywhere.

"Hey!" Aphrodite whined.

"Shut up!" I exclaimed. There was dead silence except for Kronos whacking the chair.

"You rang?" Dionysus strolled in. He saw Kronos and sighed.

"I better be getting paid for this," he grumbled and took Kronos' arm and lead him out of the room.

"Thank you," Mr. Brunner said.

"No problem," I said. I turned and glared at Luke. "Keep it in line or you'll be joining the insane asylum." I left and headed back to my office. The second I stepped inside, Taffy put down his glow-phone.

"Alice Cullen has left the building," he said solemnly. I groaned.

"Scrat's talking to her teacher, Hephaestus now. Meanwhile, Alfred and George are out looking for her."

"Probably a sale at Macy's or something," I said. I went in my office and looked at my blank wall. I used it for portals and viewing portals.

"Hocus Pocus, Abrakadabra, Alakazam… Cheezits!" I said. The wall opened up to show me Alice running through JCpenny's with George and Alfred not far behind. I sighed as Alice poured on vampire speed and left them behind. George pulled out his bayonet and shot into the racks of clothes. People screamed and ran everywhere. I sighed.

"Alice, Alice is running away. Even though she has school today. She might run past a gangster. Please send Broomhilda the Giant Hamster!" I said. A flash of lightning appeared and Broomhilda, in her giant plastic ball, rolled around Macy's, squishing racks of clothes and rolled towards Alice. She turned on her vampire speed but couldn't escape. She got stuck in one of the holes in the side. Broomhilda turned and broke a hole in the wall, rolling out. The viewing portal turned off and I sat down at my desk. That's when Finn came in.

"Having fun?"

"Shut up," I growled, scribbling my signature on one paper.

"I heard about Kronos enslaving the chair," he laughed.

"Yeah, yeah," I mumbled.

"Also, Harry Potter started a fight with Frodo today. It was over something about macadamia nut." I sighed. One thing that Harry would have to learn, don't mess with Frodo and the macadamia nuts.

"Are they ok?"

"Yeah, Delaney broke it up by threatening to eat them." I flipped over a piece of paper and scribbled a note to myself.

_Note to Self,_

_More therapy sessions for Delaney._

I got up and walked past Finn.

"Where are you going?"

"Cafeteria. I'm hungry. Meanwhile, do the papers. The ones on the left need vice principal signature." I left and went down to the cafeteria. I walked in and saw George the Redcoat screaming at Aphrodite for making Annabeth and Percy fall in love and constantly talk about each other. Delaney was threatening to eat Hermione for being a quarter short for her meal. Clarisse was giving Sam a noogie while Ares cheered her on. Athena was yelling at Ares for being a cretinous troglodyte. I got on the table and pulled out my pocket microphone.

"Listen up!" No one heard me.

"Hey!" I yelled. Still, noise.

"HEY!" I screamed. Everyone looked at me and fell silent. Time to deal with the problems.

"Ares, don't cheer on harm. Athena's right, she's always right. Clarisse, don't give hobbits noogies. They may have annoyed you like Percy with the Toilet Incident but he is your semi-friend. Aphrodite, no creating love in the cafeteria. Rule Number 5000," I said. Sure enough, on the wall, was the list of rules, and number 5000 stated that creating love in the cafeteria is strictly forbidden.

"Delaney, it's just a quarter. Let it go! And Hermione, catch," I tossed her a quarter.

"Now. Can we get along now?" Everyone nodded. "Continue," I hopped off the table and got some chicken nuggets from the Tasty Food Junction. I grabbed a tray and headed up to my office. After sitting down, Taffy came in and quietly closed the door for my privacy. Sometimes, I really liked that elf.

Me: And there you have it. The long anticipated Character Academy!

Finn: It took her forever. In her sleep, she kept muttering "Must… update… Academy… Grapefruit King…"

Me: Evil Grapefruit King!

R & R? Resist the Grapefruit King!


	2. Chapter 2

Me: And we're back!

Finn: Finally.

Me: Character Academy!

Chapter 2

_Kat POV_

After I finished my beautiful lunch in silence, I looked at my clock and realized that it was time for class. Even as a principal, I was required to teach three classes per day. I had to teach ethics. I was about to step out when Finn came in.

"Papers on the left need the vice principal signature," I pointed out.

"Oh? Does that mean I get to sit in the mushy chair?" My desk chair was a beanbag chair on wheels. Finn would marry the chair if he could.

"Yeah sure," I waved him towards the chair and he dove into it.

"Whee!" he squealed. I left the girl in my chair and went to my room. I was there for ten minutes when class number 1 came in.

"Does my hair look okay?" Jasmine gushed. "I'm going on a date with Aladdin tonight."

"Has anyone seen my glass slipper?" Cinderella whined.

"Prettyyy…" Narcissus said dreamily, staring into his glass of water. I sighed.

"Okay, class. Today we're learning about how to become sociable. I know some of you need it," I glared at Bambi who looked away sheepishly.

"So when you…" I started.

"Would anyone like an apple?" the evil witch rasped.

"I would!" Benjamin Franklin raised his hand.

"No! No apples in the classroom!" I pointed to rule number 3452 which clearly stated that no food, or poisonous food, allowed in the school. The witch sighed and slumped in her seat.

"Anyway, if you want to become…"

"Give me an A or you die!" Al Capone shrieked, holding up his machine gun. I sighed and rubbed my forehead.

"No guns in school Al," I said and took the gun away from him. He growled and sat down.

"Now as I was saying…"

"Rebel now, my troops!" George Washington yelled. Two patriots stood up and pulled out their bayonets.

"Guys…" I began but they fired into the class. Of course, since they were dead or fictional, it passed right through them, but they were still scared.

"Don't mess up my hair!" Jasmine exclaimed.

"I'm too young to die!" Snow White whined.

"Prettyyy…" Narcissus said dreamily, still staring into his glass of water. The bell rang, saving me anymore headaches. As the patriots and George Washington were heading out, I blocked their path. They grumbled, but handed over their bayonets. I threw them in the desk. They hurried out on to wherever they needed to go. I sat down and shoved my hands into my face. Sometimes I hated my life. I pressed the purple button on the glow-phone.

"Please send me some aspirin," I mumbled into the speaker.

"The whole bottle, I'm guessing," Taffy the Elf said.

"Yeah. I have two more classes."

_Finn POV_

"Whee!" I shrieked happily. I know, I sounded like a little girl, but the chair was so awesome! I really wanted the chair, but it was rare. Santa had given it to her as a present for "educating the reindeer". I swiveled around in circles until Delaney the Werewolf Girl walked by and gave me a strange look. I took out one of her pens and scanned over each paper.

_Better food in the cafeteria? Check._ I scribbled my signature and put it in the mailbox by the glow-phone.

_Sentence bad students to the dungeons? Umm… no. _I crumpled it up and threw it away. Some students were really bad, *ahem* Kronos *ahem*, but they didn't deserve to be locked up in a dungeon. I went through a few more before the bell rang, ending first class. I was almost finished when my stomach growled. I hadn't eaten lunch yet. I felt stupid. I ran as fast as I could to the cafeteria. Captain Hook ran around, shaking his hook angrily, screaming,

"Evil flying boy!" over and over again. Of course, Peter Pan had graduated last year, so he was probably crazed. Then he ran into the wall. I sighed.

"Scarface!"

"Smelly child!" Frodo and Harry Potter were at it again. They were now, like, natural enemies or something and everyday at lunch, they smothered each other with plates of spaghetti. Then they called each other names and Frodo chased Harry in a circle kicking at him. I took my pizza and sat down nearby to watch the show.

Me: Finn, you're such a bad vice principal…

Finn: Pizza…

Me: And the evil students!

R & R? Prettyyy…


	3. Chapter 3

Me: Yay! Chapter 3!

Finn: We're making fun of Alex Trebek. We're pretending he was mean to the contestants.

Me: For example…

**Alex T.: So, Denise…**

**Denis: Umm, it's Denis.**

**Alex T.: Mmm… no. It's Denise. **

**Denis: But…**

**Alex T.: Also, the response 'top dog' was acceptable by the producers, but not by me. So, instead of gaining 400, you'll lose 400.**

**Denis: !**

Chapter 3

_Kat POV_

"Death to the flying boy!" I sighed.

"Captain Hook, stop it. Peter Pan graduated _last_ year," I told him.

"Evil flying boy!" he raced around the room until Wolverine caught his arm.

"Siddown," he growled. Captain Hook ran for his chair.

"Now," I said. A spider web flew out of the crowd of students and wrapped around me.

"Agh! Spiderman…" I began.

"Who's Spiderman? I am Peter Parker, a mild-mannered photographer!" he said innocently.

"Everyone knows that you are Spiderman, nutwad," Emmett Cullen informed him. Rosalie cut me loose.

"Thank you," I glared at Peter. The bell rang.

"Bye!" Einstein left a red apple on my desk. I picked it up and wondered if he got it from the evil witch from Snow White. I locked the door behind me and was heading back to my office when I saw Alfred the Potato being carried around by George the Redcoat.

"What are you doing?" I asked them. They normally didn't come out unless there was something wrong.

"We're looking for Finn," Alfred squeaked.

"You lost him? He was in my chair! You'd think he would stay there," I frowned. "Where have you looked?"

"We checked with Melvin and Mr. Brunner and the rest of the teachers. They hadn't seen him," George explained. I turned and saw Einstein chatting up Benjamin Franklin.

"Hey! Einstein!" Voldemort looked up.

"Not you! Real Einstein!" Voldemort frowned and walked away.

"Einstein!" I yelled. He looked up and raced up to me.

"Yes?"

"Have you seen Finn?"

"Oh…"

"_Nothing more, nothing more. For my heart has turned into a sore. For she doesn't love me. Although I love she,_" Shakespeare said.

"Shut it," I said.

"I said that since E= Mc squared, he would be in the cafeteria," Einstein said.

"Oh," I said, though I didn't get it. "Silly me." I turned to George and Alfred.

"Did you check the cafeteria?"

"No…" Alfred squeaked.

"Then let's go!" I ran off towards the cafeteria, which I figured they were selling pizza. The second I stepped inside, I found him. He was laughing with Aphrodite, watching Frodo and Harry in spaghetti wars. And he wasn't stopping them. Why did I ever pick him to be the vice principal?

_Finn POV_

This. Is. Hilarious. Frodo and Harry had been shoving spaghetti in each other's faces for like an hour now. Aphrodite laughed with me.

"FINN WHITMAN!" a voice shrieked. Kat. And she didn't sound very happy. I tried to hide behind Aphrodite, but I failed.

"Get over here!" she grabbed the neck of my shirt and pulled me out of the cafeteria, leaving George and Alfred to take care of the messy 'Scarface' and 'Smelly Child'.

"What the tortilla is wrong with you?" she demanded, glaring at me.

"Umm… having fun?" I tried. She shook her head.

"No! You're the vice principal! The point is to _stop _the fights. Not lay back and eat pizza while watching them!" she whacked my arm.

"Ow!" I rubbed my arm.

"For now, you're fired."

"What?"

"You heard me," she put her hands on her hips.

"But what…"

"You can become one of our fellow students. Then see what it's like to be in a fight," she gave one last look at me before stalking down the hallway towards her office. Sheesh. If Shakira was here (sigh), she would start singing "She-Wolf" or something.

Me: Bad Finn. Tsk tsk.

Finn: That's fictional me! Not me me!

Me: Do you have a stutter?

Finn: No…

Me: Microsoft Word thinks so. See? It's underlined in red!

Finn: It also thought 'grr' wasn't a word.

Me: Club Penguin time!

Finn: Oh no.

R & R?


	4. Chapter 4

Me: This chapter gets interesting. Finn is a bad vice-principal, you know.

Finn: You told them last time.

Me: I did? –checks last chapter- Oh that's right I did.

Finn: You know, we're calling Harry Potter scarface…

Me: What's so bad about… oh. Scarface sold like drugs and stuff right?

Finn: Yea.

Me: That's not why we're calling him scarface! It's because of his scar! Don't do drugs!

Finn: Drugs are bad.

Chapter 4

_Kat POV_

"Stupid flying boy!" Captain Hook yelled. He probably lost his mind because Peter Pan graduated last year.

"_To sleep, to dream…_" Shakespeare said.

"Evil Day!" Rapunzel said.

"Ugh, what?" Set said.

"I don't know," Rapunzel giggled. Set rolled his eyes.

"Die!" Batman threw a Bat- Boomerang or whatever at me. Superman appeared in front of me and caught it.

"Fear not, citizen! For I shall…" he stated heroically.

"Sit down, Clark," I said. He sat down. The bell rang and I avoided being wildebeested. I walked out and saw George the Redcoat carrying Alfred the Potato. Alfred was a cursed potato, with no legs.

"Hi George, hi Alfred," I said.

"Hi," George said.

"Hi!" Alfred squeaked.

"Why are you out and about? If you don't know what to do, I'm pretty sure Batman is…"

"No, we're doing something," George interrupted.

"Finn needs to sign a few papers!" Alfred squeaked.

"He's in my office, the spinny chair."

"No, he's not. Taffy saw him leave," George said.

"Umm… then I don't know where he would be," I saw Einstein talking to Shakespeare.

"Hey, Einstein!" I called. Voldemort looked up.

"Not you," I told him. He frowned and walked away.

"_To sleep, perchance to dream…_" Shakespeare said to me.

"Not you, either," I said. "Where's Finn?"

"Well, since E= MC squared, he's in the cafeteria," Einstein said.

"Oh," I said, not seeing the logic in that. "Did you all check the cafeteria?"

"No…" George said. We walked into the cafeteria to see Frodo and Harry shoving spaghetti in each other's faces, yelling insults. Finn, my wonderful vice-principal, was snacking on pizza and watching the fight go down with Aphrodite, which, if I remember correctly, she should be in gym now. George intervened and grabbed both of their arms and hauled them off, leaving Alfred on the cafeteria table.

"Wait for me!" he squeaked.

"What are you doing?" I demanded. "Aphrodite, back to class! Melvin is wondering where you are." Aphrodite scurried out of the cafeteria.

"And you," I said to Finn was unsuccessfully trying to escape. "What were you thinking?"

"I can't watch a fight?"

"Anyone can watch a fight! Just not the vice-principal!"

"Can anyone hear me?" Alfred squeaked.

"Why not?" Finn asked. I rolled my eyes. Men.

"Your job is to stop all fighting when I'm not around! You'll set a bad example!"

"I won't do it again?" he said, more as a question that as a statement. I could let him go, and see what he does, and if he does it again, I'll… no. No next time! I had to deal with practically everything that was wrong with this school and then I would have to keep an eye on him too? What do I do? An idea clicked in my head and I smiled.

"You're fired," I told him.

_Finn POV_

I didn't see what I was doing wrong, but she explains things pretty well. Then she started thinking for a few minutes, and I stood there awkwardly.

"Hello? Finn? Kat?" Alfred squeaked impatiently. George came back in, glared at me, then grabbed Alfred and whisked him off. Then, she smiled. Oh no.

"You're fired," she said.

"What? You're _firing_ me?"

"Temporarily. Until you learn your lesson."

"But I have!" I protested.

"You will stay as a student and I'll organize a dorm room for you with some lovely characters. You can come by anytime tomorrow to get your things, and I'll leave your schedule in the mailbox.

"Seriously?" I asked in disbelief.

"Serious as blunt force head trauma," she replied.

"I think it's 'serious as a heart attack'," I corrected. She glared at me.

"Whatever!' she stomped off. She's been watching too much murder-mystery shows.

The next day, I went in to get my stuff and saw her dictating to the crew: George the Redcoat, Broomhilda the Giant Hamster, Randy the Skeleton, Delaney the Werewolf Girl, Taffy the Elf, Alfred the Potato, and Silvia the Vampire. I saw everything I owned in a cardboard box on my old desk, along with my schedule sitting on top. My dorm number was 534. I left as they dispersed. Randy was grumbling to himself about cleaning the septic tank. Alfred was silent, George was flirting with Silvia, who was not interested, but was instead flirting with Taffy, who wasn't even paying attention. His eyes were intent on the computer screen. Broomhilda took the big exit and began patrolling the campus, and Delaney watched me, as if to make sure I didn't kill anybody. I walked out and upstairs across 30B, where Kronos had enslaved a chair about two days ago. I wondered if Luke joined him. Then, I reached the thousands of dorms 'trailer park'. They're one thousand trailers connected together and fancified. I looked and weaved in and out of trailers until I found 534. I walked in and saw Frodo eating out of a bowl of macadamia nuts and Set attempting to burn the fireproof wall.

"Hi Finn," Set said.

'Hey," I replied.

"Hi," Frodo said. A voice crackled over the speaker in Gandalf's voice.

"Good morning students. Today's weather forecast will be 85 degress Fahrenheit and twenty percent chance of rain. In Mr. Brunner's class, there will be a test on Egyptian Gods," Set snorted. "and you better do good otherwise YOU SHALL NOT PASS. Thank you," the speaker clicked off and Set turned to me.

"You ready for the test?"

"I haven't been in the class before."

"He was the vice-principal," Frodo said with his mouth full of food.

"Ah, you have failed at something. Join me, failed brother and together we can take over the school! HAHAHA!" Set cackled. I sighed. I hope I learned my lesson soon.

Me: You have demented roommates.

Finn: What is it with Frodo and the macadamia nuts?

Me: Long story, maybe later.

Finn: Oh, umm… okay.

Me: Yeah, I don't know if I mentioned this, but we're on twitter now!

Finn: If you want to follow ME: KingdomFinn.

Me: If you want to follow me because I'm better: cookiemonstur13.

And congratulations to…

kingdomkeeping! You're the first follower from Fanfiction!

Crowd: -applause- YAY! WOOHOO!

R&R? YAY! WOOHOO!


	5. Chapter 5

Me: It's Monday, Monday, gotta get down on Monday.

Finn: Just kidding, I hate Mondays.

Me: Worst part of the school week.

Finn: Good thing we're not back in school yet, that could totally throw off the schedule.

Me: Well, Character Academy is back and ready to send Finn to an insane asylum!

Chapter 5

_Kat POV_

I really needed to inform George that Silvia wasn't interested. And to inform Silvia that Taffy wasn't interested. And to keep their love life out of the freaking office. I sat in my desk and began typing e-mails to the teachers. Taffy walked in and put some papers on my desk. One letter was decorated in green forest and written in glowing ink, special to secretaries and principals only. I certainly didn't write this.

Dear Delaney,

I received your last letter with high hopes. I loved going to Olive Garden the other night, you are quite the story teller. I'm well aware that Silvia is flirting with me, but I only have eyes for you. I'll see you at lunch today.

Taffy

Oh my gosh! Taffy and Delaney are going out? Without informing me? If anyone knew about this, Aphrodite would. I pressed the purple button on my phone which rang into Taffy's office.

"Yes?" he asked.

"Get Aphrodite in my office. Now," I ordered. He hung up and a few minutes later, Aphrodite stepped in.

"You wanted to see me?"

"Yes, it's about your power of love."

"I can't make someone fall in love with you, so don't ask," she snorted.

"I wasn't… wait, who was asking?"

"No one," she said stiffly.

"Tell me or I'll ban make-up from the school," I threatened.

"Okay, okay, Silvia the Vampire and George the Redcoat." I'd have to talk to them later.

"It's not what I was asking. Do you know anything about current relationships in the school?"

"Yeah, of course. Percy and Annabeth, Harry and Ginny, Carly Spencer and Sam Witwicky, Fang and Max, the Gasman and Nudge, Hermione and Ron, Legolas and Elizabeth Swan, Taffy and Delaney… the list is endless."

"Well, Taffy and Delaney I knew but… Legolas and Elizabeth Swan? Like, Pirates of the Caribbean Elizabeth Swan?"

"Yeah, insane isn't it? Will Turner left her for some chick named… umm… Nancy Drew or something like that." I grimaced.

"Thank you, you may go back to class now." She left. I picked up the phone and requested that George and Silvia be brought to my office. Silvia was first, because she's a super fast vampire, then George.

"Take a seat," I said, waving my hand to the chairs. George kept sneaking glances at Silvia, who wasn't even paying attention.

"Okay, you can't ask Aphrodite for love advice, okay? I hate to break it you guys, George, you like Silvia, but Silvia likes Taffy, who likes Delaney, who likes Taffy back. So, you both are in the dirt on this. I don't want to hear anything about you, George, trying to get Silvia to fall in love with you, and you, Silvia, about getting Taffy to fall in love with you. Have I made myself clear?" They nodded.

"Now, go." They stood up and ran out as fast as they could. I opened my drawer and pulled out the bracelet. I never thought I would have to do this, but… I put it on my wrist and it glowed before dimming into a regular-looking bracelet. This bracelet did not exist anywhere else. It had the ultimate power to erase a fictional character off the face of the earth or take their magical properties away from them, making them real. It could also, hopefully, cure the school of the disease. They call this bracelet _The Bracelet that doesn't exist_. But I call it, _Charm Bracelet_. Because that's what it is.

_Finn POV_

What is the name of the Egyptian god to the Underworld?

Set

B. Osiris

Isis

None of the above

I hate my life. I was on the third question out of ten and I had no idea what I was doing.

_Pick B. Finn,_ a voice said.

_What?_ Then I realized that in the final chapters of KKMR, Kat had written in a voice in my head. I circled B.

_C., now A., now D., now D., now C., A., C., B. _Voice said. I circled each one and turned in my paper. I sat there, quite bored, gazing around my new classroom. In my class, I had Zeus, Hades, Poseidon, George Washington, Set, Thoth, Sam (Frodo's buddy), Pocahontas, Sleeping Beauty, and me. The door opened and a beautiful girl who was dressed in ordinary clothes walked in. She had grey eyes and dark brown hair.

"Is this… Mr. Brunner's class?" she asked.

"Yes, take a seat, I'll be with you in a moment," he said. The only empty seat was next to me. Yes! The Fates were on my side. The Fates appeared momentarily, glaring at me, then vanished. Sleeping Beauty turned in her test finally.

"The bell will ring soon, so be prepared," Mr. Brunner announced. I turned to the new girl.

"Hi, I'm Finn. And you are…?"

"Katniss. Katniss Everdeen," she said firmly.

"Well, Katniss, welcome to Character Academy. Stay out of the way of Frodo and his macadamia nuts, okay?"

"What?" she asked, confused. The bell rang and I headed off, still thinking about Katniss Everdeen.

I went into Kat's office the next morning, asking her how long my punishment was, because last night, Set believed in some strange ritual and almost lit the trailer on fire. Of course, Frodo did nothing but curl up in the corner and watch. Only when I had arrived had something sensual be done. He was lighting candles and one fell and flamed on Frodo's bedsheet. I facepalmed and grabbed the fire extinguisher, then put out the fire and sent Set to bed. He grumbled and when I was putting away the candles, Frodo was staring at me creepily. I went up to Taffy, who was smiling bigger than usual.

"Hey, Taffy, can I talk to Kat?"

"Who?" he asked dreamily. I gave him a weird look.

"Kat," I repeated.

"Oh! Yeah, she's… back there somewhere. Oh an email!" he squealed. I wrinkled my face up and went into her office. Kat wasn't there but there were papers on her desk.

"Kat?" I asked. Then, I realized how much it sounded like Katniss. The door closed behind me suddenly. Then, a figure zipped across the room and shut the blinds.

"Who…?"

"Shh! It's me, genius!" Kat hissed.

"What are you doing?" I asked. "Do the lights have to be off?"

"Yes. There's something wrong with the school."

"Besides the usual madness?" I kind of waited for King Leonidas to barge in but he didn't.

"Aphrodite informed me of the secret relationships throughout the school. Today, I asked her when they started, she said about Wednesday of last week."

"And this means what?"

"It's a disease," she whispered. She held out her arm and I saw the glowing charm bracelet.

"Is that normal?" I asked.

"It's The Bracelet," she said.

"Yeah, it's a bracelet, I can see that."

"No, you idiot! It's _The_ Bracelet! The one that can erase a fictional character off the face of the earth!" she whispered. I had heard stories but I didn't think it was real.

"And you're bringing this out because people are falling in love?"

"Someone's hiding in the school, acting as a character, and infecting people. It won't be long before everyone is infected and no one can think straight."

"And you're going to shoot them with the bracelet when you find them."

"Yeah, it will send them straight to the prison."

"Prison?" I asked. I didn't even know there was a prison.

"Yes, you genius, let's go." She grabbed my arm and lead me off.

Me: Sorry for randomly including Katniss in this. I just finished Hunger Games.

Finn: Very action-y. I hope they don't screw it up.

Me: The Bracelet! Hehe.

Finn: Terrifying.

Me: I could get rid of you.

Finn: No you won't.

Me: I didn't say I would, I just say I could.

Finn: Whatever.

Me: Well it's late and so am I!

Finn: We were reading most of the day.

Me: So have fun!

Finn: Don't die!

R & R? Or Set will light YOUR bedsheets on fire.


	6. Chapter 6

Me: Yay! Randomness ensues on this episode of Character Academy!

Finn: Oh, joy…

Me: Bedsheets will flame! And so will love!

Crowd: Awwww –sighs-

Me: I still have them from the awards ceremony. They won't leave…

Finn: It's irritating, especially when they applaud when we're sleeping.

Chapter 6 I think

_Kat POV_

After a relatively weird conversation in the dark with Finn, I stepped out to get some tater tots, leaving him confused in the middle of the office with crazed Taffy and Delaney. I walked into the cafeteria and got some food. I was beginning to enjoy my meal in peace and quiet in the cafeteria when I found a disturbing topic. There must be at least fifty students here, why are they not causing chaos normally? I stood up and looked around the room. I saw that they were all talking quietly and hugging and kissing and laughing with their boyfriend/girlfriend.

"Agh!" I shrieked and ran out, losing my appetite. I ran back into my office. Finn was spinning in Taffy's chair.

"Where's Taffy?" I asked him.

"He said he had to go somewhere and he took Delaney outside," Finn replied.

"You should see the chaos inside the cafeteria!" I exclaimed.

"That bad, huh? Worse than usual?"

"No! They're quiet!" I said.

"They're quiet?" Finn asked, surprised.

"As a mouse," I said.

"Oh well, this isn't good," he said. He glanced out of the window and his eyes widened. "Umm, I have to go Kat, later!" he escaped out the door and I looked where he had. The new girl, Katniss Everdeen was writing something and Finn approached her and they started talking. Then Katniss laughed at something Finn said. She took his hand and they walked away together.

"No! Finn!" I yelled. Dang it, I lost him. Well, I had to do something. I slipped on the charm bracelet and wandered around the school, trying to see if I could discover anything about the hidden character. I went into the trailer park and walked around them. I had just reached Trailer No. 405 when I entered the trailer. I looked around the place and was about to leave when the bracelet started glowing. It wasn't dark in here or anything, but it started glowing. Something was wrong with the bracelet! Dang it, that was the only chance I had of destroying the disease. I took it off and was about to slip it into my pocket when it flew out of my hand and attached itself to a _Believe in Yourself!_ poster. I pulled it off and took the poster off the wall. There was a gaping hole there._ I should get maintenance on that._ I noticed a small vile sitting in the hole. I went to go pull it out when I saw the heart carved on the glass. Probably would affect me if I touched it. I went in the closet and stole a sparkly shirt off a hanger. I wrapped it around the vile and walked out to go back to my office. Taffy wasn't at his desk and no one else seemed to be in the office. I sat down and examined it, Well, it had something to do with love, because of the heart.

_Who is in trailer 405? _I flipped up the clipboard and scanned down to 405. Katniss, Hermione, and Aphrodite. Of course! Aphrodite did it! She is the goddess of love after all. Then, again, Hermione is good with potions… I have no clue, or even how to know whom it is. I sighed and facepalmed. I should check with someone who knew exactly how to deal with this. Someone who would never fall in love. Artemis. I ran out of my office with the vile still wrapped in the sparkly shirt. No one was in class due to the ultimate madness. As I was running, I tripped over something. I looked and saw it was a small polka-dotted platypus with green wings and red eyes. A small ravioli sat next to it with huge brown eyes.

"Help me, Kat!" it squeaked. The platypus made a barking noise and went to eat the ravioli. A snatched the ravioli up and aimed my bracelet at the platypus and it vanished in a burst of sparks.

"Thanks, Kat!" it squeaked.

"Umm, how do you know me?"

"Everyone knows you!"

"Okay… what's your name?"

"I don't have one…"

"Mr. Ravioli?"

"Yeah!" So me and Mr. Ravioli went to go find Artemis.

_Finn POV_

Katniss thought I was funny! Wonderful day it is. She took my hand and she pulled me into the cafeteria, it was extremely quiet as Kat said. Oh, no, I left Kat alone in her office. She was going to murder me.

"So, tell me about yourself, Finnegan," she said. It was weird momentarily because I don't remember telling her my name. Oh well, whatever.

"I'm from the book Kingdom Keepers and I'm a holographic tour guide at the Magic Kingdom," I said. "I fight the Overtakers and save the world. No big deal."

"I'm from the book Warriors. I fight others and live with my clan," Katniss said. Now, I don't keep track of all the characters in the books but I know that Katniss Everdeen is from the Hunger Games. She saw my confusion and smiled.

"Oh Finn, you figured out my tricky plot," she said. It wasn't really tricky, since she announced that she was from the Warriors series, you know, with cats and stuff. "Now I have to eliminate you." Okay, that part scared me. She smiled at me then pulled out a gun and shot me in the arm.

"Ah!" I shouted. I've been shot! I can feel the blood seeping out! The pain! My life was ebbing away!

"Stop that," Katniss frowned. "It's just a tranquilizer. I can read minds as well." Oh, just a tranquilizer. I blacked out.

When I woke up, I was tied to a chair in a lone room. You know, typical kidnapper scenario. A fat horse-donkey thing approached me. It was really creepy. It had two wooden legs, like pirates', and yellow eyes that glowed. It had sharp and pointy teeth and when it talked it made some chattering noise.

"I can't understand you," I told it. It frowned and clopped away. Then, the freakier thing came in. It was a cucumber. It was taller than the normal cucumber, but it had eyes and legs and arms. It glared at me.

"You're a cucumber," I stated.

"No! I'm NOT A CUCUMBER!" the cucumber screamed. "I'm A ZUCCHINI!"

"Okay, zucchini, what do you want? Where's Katniss?"

"I am Katniss!"

"I thought you said you were a zucchini."

"No! I AM a zucchini!"

"But you just said…"

"Enough! I morphed into Katniss to hack into the school and poison everyone with Love Bug!"

"Yeah, that makes total sense," I muttered.

"My evil plan…" the cucumber said.

"This should be good," I mumbled.

"was to destroy the school and The Bracelet so no fictional character could be erased. Then, I could unleash my army!" it said. The zucchini raised it's arms and three creatures came out. A dragon without one wing and coughing smoke, the fat horse-donkey thing, and a small rubber duck with short little legs.

"Is this your army?" I asked in disbelief.

"Yeah. Not many willing recruits," the zucchini pondered. "Nonetheless, I developed a new plan! I would infect the school so they couldn't do anything when I attacked!"

"With this army?" I asked again.

"Stop asking questions! Let me finish!" the zucchini whined. It sighed and continued. "But Kat caught onto my plan and I transformed into Katniss to distract you! But you caught on, you clever boy."

"The Warriors series is about a bunch of cats."

"KATniss, cat? Do you see? I don't know what series she's from!" the zucchini stomped a foot and glared at me.

"Okay, what makes you think you can take over now?"

"Kat will hand over the bracelet or you will die!"

"How is that possible? I can't die, I'm fictional. What place are you from?"

"I… I don't know! Let me think about it! I'm from… Kat's Brain!"

"What?" I asked.

"Kat comes up with random stuff, so I popped in to destroy her before she erases me as she has done to my friends!"

"You had friends?" I said. I was expecting it to throw a zucchini temper tantrum but it sighed.

"Not really."

"Okay…"

"So go back into unconciousness boy!" she shot me with the tranquilizer.

Me: I told you that randomness is in here.

Finn: I don't really like zucchini.

Me: Oh and by the way, Katniss isn't evil. The zucchini is, pretending to be Katniss.

Finn: And we're going to North Carolina tomorrow, so there won't be WiFi.

Me: -sadness- But my grandpa's place does! I'm going there on Friday, in enough time to post the first chapter of KKPJ.

Finn: But Ramblings is postponed until we can… post it.

Me: It's late and Ray William Johnson's video comes up soon.

Finn: Yayness!

Me: So we will go now!

Finn: And thanks to NinaBlossom for favoriting this story! I hope you like the randomness!

R & R?


	7. Chapter 7

Me: And we're back!

Finn: From North Carolina.

Me: Where I went to my great-grandmother's house.

Finn: Who is not technologically advanced. AT ALL.

Me: And we're talking 35 channels!

Finn: No computer!

Me: Barely any reception!

Finn: We're lucky to be alive!

Me: Just… barely…

Finn: Randomness from last chapter explained in here.

Me: It was entertaining to write.

Chapter 7

_Kat POV_

I couldn't find Artemis anywhere. Mr. Ravioli that I rescued from a platypus was no help. He kept rambling on about his life, how he had a girl back at home, an elbow macaroni, and his life. It was very boring. I was ready to dump him in marinara sauce and eat him.

"Where are you from anyway?" I interrupted some story about his great-great-great-great ravioli.

"Oh! I'm from Kat's Brain," he squeaked.

"What?" I asked. My brain?

"Yeah! Since you're a Fanfiction writer, your writing is so powerful, your imagination's characters are brought to life! Like Candice, the shape-shifting zucchini!"

"Candice the… oh! I vaguely remember her."

"Well, since you kind of forgot about her, she's angry and is trying to take over the school by infecting the school with the love disease! Oh! And she shifted into Katniss and has captured Finn in her lair. I could swear that Grandma Ravioli took her pills before I left…"

"What? She has Finn? Where's her lair?" I asked frantically, almost dropping Mr. Ravioli.

"Ah! Her lair is underneath her trailer!" he squealed. I set Mr. Ravioli on a bench and took off.

"Wait for me!" he called after me. I didn't go back to get him.

I had gone through two-hundred and thirty-one trailers, and to no avail. Maybe I should have brought Mr. Ravioli, even though he was irritating. I recalled exactly what he had said.

"Ah! Her lair is underneath her trailer!" he had said. Her trailer? Candice didn't have a trailer. She wasn't a student here. Then I remembered he had mentioned that Candice had shifted into Katniss from the Hunger Games. Katniss' trailer, 405! I stepped out and zig-zagged around trailers until I found Trailer No. 405. I walked in and by bracelet started glowing again. I wasn't taking it off, because it might fly off and I probably couldn't find it again. Of course, I couldn't prevent it from becoming magnetic to whatever. It went in the direction it wanted to go, regardless where I was attached or not. I was skidding and stumbling around the room into nightstands, dressers, and chairs. It attached itself onto the headboard of a bed.

"Ugh," I mumbled, struggling to my feet. I yanked it off the headboard and poked at it until I hit a wooden star and it sank into the wood. The floor began to sink and rumble and I stumbled into things until I grasped the handle to the closet. It went down for a few moments before it shuddered to a stop. A couple of doors slid open, it reminded me of an elevator. It revealed this really old place with a few dinosaur computers and a rubber duck with short little legs 'guarding' the exit. I remembered dreaming about it when I was little, playing with my rubber ducky in the bathtub. I went behind a pipe and peeked out. It was sleeping. I waved my hand in front if it's face and it didn't move a muscle. I continued on. I heard someone screaming. I didn't run, it was just Candice. Being the weird cucumber she was.

_Finn POV_

When I woke up, the horse-donkey thing was guarding me and the zucchini was screaming at the dragon who breathed smoke in her face. Something about a health issue.

"I'll shrivel!" it shrieked. It was hard to tell if it was male or female. It turned to me and smiled. "You're awake!" she said.

"Yes," I sighed. "Unfortunately."

"Do you wish to die, boy?" it threatened. I don't know about you, but I wasn't really threatened by a zucchini. I chuckled a bit.

"He's laughing!" it said, offended. "Am I not threatening you?"

"Not really…" I said between laughs. I heard a noise and looked the way it came. Kat stood there, not surprised at all that there was a zucchini standing in front of me.

"Hi Candice," Kat said nonchalantly. So the cucumber was a girl. I mean, zucchini.

"Kat," Candice spit out. If zucchini's could spit.

"Release Finn and I'll let you live," she said.

"You'll have to go through my army!" Candice cackled. Kat raised an eyebrow. The rubber duck, horse-donkey thing, and the dragon who was missing a wing came in, growling and trying to look ominous.

"I remember you," she said, nodding to the dragon. "You were my imaginary friend! And then I grew up." The dragon hissed smoke. "Oh that's right, I didn't want you hurting anyone. Or flying away." Then, Kat looked at the horse-donkey thing. "I don't remember you."

"Of course not!" Candice howled. "Kill her!" They all advanced slowly. The dragon lunged and Kat easily sidestepped. Then she aimed her bracelet, probably The Bracelet, and said, "Begone!" and the dragon squealed, then vaporized into a pile of dust.

"Tomatoes! She has The Bracelet!" Candice mumbled. She untied me and pulled out a small knife and held it to my throat. Kat vaporized the rubber duck.

"Oh Kat!" Candice said in a sing-songy voice. "Slide the bracelet to me and let your boyfriend live!"

"He's not my boyfriend," she said at the same time I said, "I'm not her boyfriend."

"Whatever! Slide it to me or he dies. Don't even think about shooting at me, he'll become a meat shield and he'll get hit and die!" Kat frowned, considering the possibilities. I hope that me dying was not on the list. She took off the bracelet and slid it across the room. The horse-donkey thing picked it up and handed it to Candice.

"Now let go of Finn!" she demanded. She shoved me towards her and I quickly ran to that side of the room.

"You need to get out of here," she whispered.

"What? You'll get yourself killed!" I hissed back.

"I'm not fictional, it doesn't count. But for you it does! Run!" I turned and took off.

"I didn't dismiss you!" Candice said. She aimed at me and said, "Begone!" I expected a sharp pain and for me to die, but nothing happened. I stopped and turned. Candice was standing there, quite surprised. I didn't know why until I followed her gaze. It was where there was not a pile of dust in front of me, but a little, glowing orb.

"Lucky," Candice said. "No friend of mine would die for me." What friend? Uh oh…

"Kat?" I called grabbing at the orb, but it vanished. "Kat!" Was she dead? I hope not.

"Well no one's going to protect you!" she cackled again. Then a thud from behind and Candice fell, unconscious. A small ravioli stood there with a tranquilizer gun ten times bigger than him.

"Um," was all I could utter.

"Is Kat here? She abandoned me on a park bench and…" he squeaked.

"Ummm," I said again.

"Is that all you can say?" he demanded. It was hilarious that this small thing was all up in my face. I would be dying of laughter if it weren't for the horrid situation. Kat was dead.

"Kat's gone," I said.

"Did she get hit by the bracelet?" he asked.

"Yeah," I said.

"Well of course she's not dead! It doesn't affect real people! She's probably in the Inner Sanctum!"

"The what?" I asked.

"It's where people and animals go if they get zapped by The Bracelet, and they slowly make their way to the Underworld and can never return. Are we going on an adventure?" he squeaked. Someone was an optimist.

"Sure," I said. If Kat wasn't dead, I was going to save her. "What's your name?" I asked the ravioli.

"Kat called me Mr. Ravioli! How creative!" Yes, Mr. Ravioli. So creative.

Me: Yay! Finny is going to save me!

Finn: -grumbles-

Me: And now for the surprise!

Randy the Skeleton: -appears- -drumroll- -disappears-

Finn: WE'RE POSTING RAMBLINGS AND KKPJ TODAY!

Me: Yay! That's right! I'm posting Ramblings and KKPJ because I didn't last week!

Finn: But don't worry! Ramblings and KKPJ will resume as usual!

Me: A present for you all!

Crowd: -uproarious applause-

Finn: I also hoped we explained the randomness of the last one.

Me: Except for the platypus.

Finn: Yeah, we don't know where he came from.

Platypus: -weird noises-

Me: -shudder- He's creepy.


	8. Chapter 8

Me: Sorry we're late!

Finn: We were playing with video editing software.

Me: So confuzzling!

Finn: Too many technical phrases! Argh!

Me: What am I typing?

Finn: … Character Academy!

Me: Oh yes, that's right.

Chapter 8

_Kat POV_

Who knows why I took a shot for Finn. I guess that meant certain death for him, and less so for me. Oops. Now I appeared in this weird place. It was dark with torches with green flames lighting up the walls. There was this huge line spiraling down a staircase. Every few minutes or so, I would forward a bit. More people appeared behind me. I tapped the person in front of me. He turned and glared at me.

"What?"

"Where am I?"

"Inner Sanctum," he said, turning back around.

"I wasn't finished!" I said. He ignored me. I sighed and tapped him again.

"What now?"

"What's the Inner Sanctum?"

"It's the place where the half-dead go, hoping to be rescued. But it hasn't happened in three-hundred years." He turned around again, shifting forward. I poked his shoulder again.

"Where does the line lead to?"

"Death. We're lucky the line is so long. The people in the front die first."

"I'm half-dead?"

"Yes. So am I and the person behind you."

"How'd you die?" I asked.

"Scorpion bite. I'm in a coma. They buried me yesterday. No hope of anyone finding me. How did you die?"

"I'm not dead. I'm half-dead. Magic," I said, knowing he wouldn't believe me. But he nodded and turned forward.

"How do you get out?"

"You can't. The ropes surrounding us are tinted with poison that will kill you in thirty seconds. If you dig through the ground, by some miracle, you might be able to get free."

"Up?" I asked. Maybe I could fly.

"No. The Furies guard the airs," he said. The Furies! I looked up and saw them swooping around and cackling at people.

"Hey! Over here!" I jumped up and down, waving my arms. Fury Alecto swooped towards me.

"Kat," she hissed. "What do you want?"

"Get me out of here!" I exclaimed. "I'll tell Hades to give you a raise!"

"We're rich as can be."

"I'll kill your enemies."

"Everyone's my enemy. Call me back when you find a good excuse," she hissed and flew away. I hoped Finn was on his way. I poked the man again. He sighed.

"Yes?"

"What's your name?"

"Thomas."

"Okay, Thomas, I'll find us a way out."

_Finn POV  
><em>Mr. Ravioli was annoying as Hades. Not Hades the god. He blabbered on and on about nothing. I sighed. I had to ask him questions twenty-four seven to get a real response. I was ready to throw the ravioli into a pot and cook him with some marinara sauce.

"Where is the entrance to the Inner Sanctum?" I interrupted.

"Oh! It's in Olympus! So Grandma Ravioli fell off of her rocking chair into the pond and Cousin Ravioli saved her!"

"Is that the same Cousin Ravioli who ate dirt?"

"No that was Cousin Ravioli. This Cousin Ravioli announced he could eat a horse." I facepalmed. I now had a migraine.

"Where's Olympus?" I asked.

"In New York. After dinner, I went in the woods with…"  
>"Where in New York?"<p>

"New York City," he squeaked. "I went in the woods with Cousin Ravioli and we…"

"Where in New York City?"

"Gosh! You ask so many questions! My grandpa asked questions like you. One time…"

"Just TELL ME where Olympus is!"

"Fine! Two-hundredth floor, Empire State Building. Where was I?"

"I have no idea," I said. I picked him up and put him in my backpack, getting blissful silence for three minutes. He unzipped the top and started squealing.

"Why did you do that? I could've suffocated in there! Are you mad at me? Why would you be mad at me? Because I talk a lot? Fine I won't talk again!" he squealed. Then he stopped.

"Thank you," I muttered.

"I remember now! I was in the woods with Cousin Ravioli and we went…" I groaned. It was going to be a long flight to New York City.

Me: This ending reminds me of the first chapter of KKPJ.

Finn: Agreed.

Me: Sorry it's so short. I have to get up early tomorrow to clean my room.

Finn: And I have to help! Noo!

Me: It's mostly your stuff!

Finn: No it's not!

Me: Whose is this? –picks up basketball-

Finn: Mine, but…

Me: Whose is… this? –picks up DS-

Finn: Mine, but…

Me: Whose is THIS? –picks up notebook-

Finn: Mine…

Me: Whose is…

Finn: I get it!

R & R? Pretteh please! With chocolate on top?


	9. Chapter 9

Me: Character Academy! Yay!

Finn: Oh joy! I get to rescue you from the Inner Sanctum!

Me: Yeah, sorry the last chapter was short. It was a 'filler' as people call it.

Finn: Filler, a noun, a chapter of a book or document that is short and important things do not happen but is necessary for the viewer or reader's aid.

Me: Dictionary dot com.

Chapter 9

_Kat POV_

"How are you going to get us out?"

"I'm a Fanfiction writer, I can do anything!"

"Magical powers don't work here."

"I'm not a wizard," I protested. Dumbledore, a few people ahead of us, turned and waved. I didn't know how he got here, he was at school. I shook the question off and took a look around. Anything that would be a good excuse for Alecto to take me away? I'll give her a chocolate doughnut? I called her back over.

"Have you found the reason?" she hissed.

"I'll give you a free scholarship to Character Academy," I said. Alecto sighed.

"Better than that. There's one thing that I would really want," she said.

"What is it?" I asked excitedly.

"A slave."

"What?" I asked, bewildered. "I could probably take you back in time, but don't you think that's a little…"

"Not those slaves! An able-bodied fictional slave!" she exclaimed.

"Well, Edward Cullen is very…"

"No, not Edward Cullen," Alecto spit out his name. "Finnegan Whitman."

"What? No! You want Finn as a slave?" I said. Should I? Was he even coming to rescue me? Or was he going to take over the school? I couldn't be certain.

"Of course. It also gives me free passes to Disney World."

"I heard Poseidon doesn't like it there," I pointed out. I shifted a few feet forward in line.

"He's a barnacle brain. Don't tell him I said that."

"I won't tell him if you take me out of here," I hinted.

"This spot in line?" she clarified.

"Yes, from this spot in line," I said exasperated.

"Okay!" she chuckled as her claws grabbed my shoulders and picked me up.

"Thank you," I sighed. "I was quite concerned when you…" I was saying before she dropped me even closer to the pit in line.

"What are you doing?" I shrieked. Alecto laughed and flew away. I was even closer to death than before.

"Oh Finn, please hurry if you're coming at all," I mumbled as the fire pit to my death was now visible.

_Finn POV_

On the plane to New York City was blissful. I had put Mr. Ravioli in the backpack in the cargo hatch of the plane. Thrilled that I could get a break, I went on Kat's laptop, which was cluttered with half-stories (stories started but never finished), chapters typed, waiting to be published… it was a mess. I got into this one story that Kat wrote the first chapter of, it had no title, but she had the summary. It was about angels falling from the sky and killing citizens of Earth and it was up to Amaryllis and Sophie to save the world. I had a feeling that they wouldn't save Earth in this story, perhaps a trilogy. I fell asleep for a bit before the captain announced twenty minutes to landing. I went on to look up fictional things. I found the Inner Sanctum in zero point two five seconds. It said it was underneath a sewer on Broadway. Yay, swimming. I exited and looked around. Two passengers were sleeping. One was trying to get out of the squishing seats. One guy was blasting music, and the other was looking out the window. I sighed and looked out as well. I gave a small squeak and a few people looked at me. I shut the window quickly and looked back out my window. There it was, flying next to the plane, Fury Alecto, grinning weirdly at me. I shut the window again and burrowed in my seat, hoping the flight would be over.

When I came out of the airport, I was expecting Fury Alecto to offer me a ride, but it didn't. Mr. Ravioli was silent and it turns out, he fell asleep. Thank goodness. I got out of the taxi and walked around to find Broadway. I saw a group of six kids lead by a dark-haired girl walking out of an alleyway. I went up to the girl.

"Excuse me, I… what?" I got a good look at the other kids. It was us! The DHIs! Finn was in the front looking confused.

"It's me!" I exclaimed.

"Finn?" Amanda asked.

"Yeah! What are you… oh," I said, realizing what happened. The Kingdom Keepers Percy Jackson crossover took place here. These were the fictional characters.

"Hey Thalia, where's Broadway?" I asked her.

"How do you know my name?" she snarled.

"Where's Broadway?" I yelled.

"That way," she jerked her thumb to her right.

"Thanks!" I called, running down the street away from my friends. I heard a noise in my backpack. He was up. Ugh.

Me: I was considering adding 'Wow! Amanda looks beautiful today!' or something, but Power Play explained EVERYTHING!

Finn: -groans-

Me: And you wanted me to read it…

Finn: It is MY book after all.

Me: Did you write it?

Finn: No…

Me: Then it isn't your book. How dare you read my cluttered files.

Finn: It was on there! And that's the only way I could find you. In the story.

Me: I should have added in chapter two of KKPJ that Finn ran up to you...

–laughs- That would've freaked people out, like I'm psychic or something.

Finn: You got me. –sarcasm-

Me: -frowns- You forgot to grab the bracelet off of Candice the Zucchini.

Finn: Bad me.

Me: I'm going to throw in Maleficent to go to school. With Chernabog, just to freak you out! Hahaha!

Please review! Thank ya!


	10. Chapter 10

Me: Character Academy updating time!

Finn: About time!

Me: I have school for…. Awhile, but I will still be posting and updating and stuff!

Finn: We also got a community after figuring out what it was!

Me: It's about Kingdom Keepers, so if you're a fan, go there to Kingdom Keepers SUPPORT! Yeah, specific, I know, I created it.

Finn: Also lovely information about our lives at the bottom, or on Ramblings, if we feel like it.

Me: Therefore, Chapter… ten I think.

Chapter 10

_Kat POV_

I hated Fury Alecto right now. Why would she drop me off further in line, close to the pit of fire. It would at least be a few more days until I got there but I heard their screams... it was just, ugh. Worst of all, the people in front of me had horrible voices and talked their heads off! I would have to get them to shut up before my ears started bleeding. The one called Butch had this raspy voice that broke occasionally and made fun of people within earshot. I would describe more, but that is horrifying enough. Not for you, but for me, because I have to listen to them. I wondered how Finn was coming along. Maybe he was running the school now. I couldn't help but think that he was still suspended from his vice-principal duties. Maybe he was coming for me. Yes, of course he was, he wouldn't exactly ditch me. Well, I guess me kidnapping him made things worse.

_Hello Kat,_ someone said.

"Who said that?" I asked out loud, looking behind me.

_I'm in your head. It's me, the voice._

"But you're James Patterson's character, not mine," I said.

_No no, this is Finn's voice, not Max's._

"What are you doing here? Is Finn on his way?"

_Perhaps._

"Is that a yes?" I asked. It didn't say anything. "I'll erase you if you don't answer me," I threatened.

_Yes he's on his way. _I jumped for joy and Muriel, the old lady behind me glared at me. I ignored her, because she was half-dead, I didn't really care. I looked around, smiling, thinking Finn would jump out and save me at that moment. Yeah, right. My stomach growled at me and I realized I was hungry. I waved to Fury Alecto, still angry at her, and asked her if she had food.

"Of course."

"Can I have some?" I asked hopefully.

"Of course! Not!" she cackled. "You'll be dead soon, so it doesn't matter!" I had an idea.

"I don't even believe you have food."

"Of course I do!"

"I don't see it, so it must not exist," I said. She zapped a peanut butter and jelly sandwich and held it up.

"It exists! Do you believe me now?"

"Children's play. It might be fake," I said. She flew closer. I leaned forward and smelled it. My hands grabbed for it but she flew directly above me.

"Ha! You thought you would get this sandwich? You must've…" she gasped and disappeared in a puff of blue smoke, dropping the sandwich and I caught it.

"Where'd she go?" Muriel asked.

"I killed her," I lied, eating the sandwich. I was a cold-hearted, fictional character killer. Go me.

_Finn POV  
><em>I had a hard time falling asleep in the hotel. I was on my way to the sewer when night was falling and taxi drivers were going to hit me. I needed a plan of some sort and needed to rest for then night. I was welcoming any sleep. But apparently, raviolis don't sleep. I was ready to chloroform him.

"When I was just a wee ravioli, I got a yo-yo and I thought it was the best thing ever! But after it broke… hey did I tell you that story? No, I didn't, did I? Hey Finn?" he was saying. I threw a pillow on top of him. Muffled noises came from the pillow, but I ignored him. Finally, silence. He probably couldn't escape from there anyway, so I had the night to myself.

I awoke to some annoying kid running down the hallway talking loudly. I got out of bed and checked the time. Nine forty-three. I changed, brushed my teeth, grabbed my backpack and the hotel card and checked out., not noticing that Mr. Ravioli had been left behind. I walked out into the New York morning, wondering how I was going to open up a sewer with a bunch of cars coming my way. I saw a _Road Work Ahead_ sign and uprooted it from its spot. I carried the sign and stuck it by the first road entering Broadway. No car stopped, or turned, so I was back to square one. I turned and saw construction workers, replacing the sign I stole and throwing orange cones all over the place, then heading back to the bulldozer a few yards away. I crept forward and slid behind a tree, glancing to make sure they didn't see me. Then, I raced forward, grabbing four to five cones and running as fast as I could back to the beginning of Broadway. I set the cones down evenly and only covered half of the road. I had lots of work to do.

It was now a routine. Hide behind the tree, get the cones and run back. I snacked occasionally on a granola bar in my backpack, which I hung on a somewhat low tree branch. I had nicely covered both roads and no car came by. I grabbed my backpack and lifted the heavy sewer lid. It was incredibly dirty, and I was afraid I was going to drop it on my foot and kill myself. I slid myself in and shut the sewer lid behind me. I stepped on a rat and it squeaked and ran away. Lovely sewer swimming.

Me: Ew, you're going to smell after that Finn.

Finn: OF course I am.

Me: Ummm, oh yes, the community. I take every Kingdom Keepers story and read all of it! Please TRY and use punctuation and spell everything you can correctly! Finn's OCD.

Finn: -twitch twitch-

Me: I just started it and we have a grand total of….

Finn: ONE SUBSCRIBER! Yay.

Me: Yeah, we're trying to gain notice for the books because it needs to be a movie, hence Kingdom Keepers SUPPORT! part.

Finn: Follow me on Twitter! We're quite social… KingdomFinn. There's actually fakes of me all over Facebook and Twitter. LIES! That's not me. My profile picture is this drawing that Kat found of me. It looks nothing like me.

Me: He has brown hair.

Finn: Well, that, but I don't even own such a hideous shirt.

Me: Opinions.

Finn: Quite.

**Join Communities! It doesn't require any work. Just submit stories and I could post it on Rhyming Timing! If it's good enough…. Nah, I'll post as many as I can! **


	11. Chapter 11

Me: Today's Monday! Worst day of the week in my opinion.

Finn: Agreed.

Me: I got new 'shades yesterday! Quite epic!

Finn: Like everyone at school complimented on it…

Me: Go me and my style!

Finn: Yeah… if you want more random stuff about our lovely lives, plus updates on the stories…

Me: Follow us on Twitter! I'm cookiemonstur13 and Finn is KingdomFinn.

Finn: I changed my picture to a hamburger in the shape of the Apple icon!

Me: Mine's the Epic Nyan Cat! Whose is better? Look and see… mine is.

Chapter 11

_Kat POV_

Every single dead person was trying to be discreet and talk about me behind my back. I could hear them whispering about my killing of one of the Furies. Some believed me to be some sort of deity. Others thought I was an immortal zombie or something. A new rumor was that Fury Alecto would escape from the Underworld and wreak havoc on the world. Yay. I sighed as the whispering had brought a new life to the silence. The line moved forward and so did my time. I looked around as if there was a clock anywhere. I turned to the people behind me and asked if they knew the time. They all looked around as if not wanting to respond.

"Tell me the time or I'll kill you!" I exclaimed. Suddenly, everyone knew what time it was.

"Six-thirty!" someone said.

"No, it's three fifty-nine!" someone else hollered.

"It's actually eleven o' clock!" someone shouted from a few people away. Everyone was screaming and arguing, all believing they knew what time it was. Then everyone abruptly fell silent. I looked and saw they all had their eyes widened and were staring straight head. I gave them a funny look and turned back. Fury Alecto hovered above me.

"Kat…" she hissed.

"Oh, you again," I said.

"Where's the sandwich?"

"I ate it," I announced proudly.

"We thought you were dead!" Six-Thirty yelled.

"No, I was just summoned by Hades for a brief moment. Now go back to your miserable lives!"

"Yes ma'am," Eleven O' Clock said.

She fluttered off to go take care of some more people in line when there was an earthquake-like thing that shook the flooring. I looked down in time to see a huge crack spreading through the floor. It stopped just underneath me and before I had the sense to move, it split open, and I fell through. Someone caught me and I freaked out. I accidentally slapped them, trying to get away.

"Ow!" he said, dropping me into the sewer. Uck.

"Oh. Hi Finn," I said, brushing myself off.

_Finn POV_

I waded through the disgusting pipe system with grime, rats and other disgusting things swirling in the murky waters. I remember watching this movie _Disturbia_ and the neighbor was a serial killer. The main character, named after a piece of lettuce, Kale, fell through the neighbor's flooring and into this huge pond thing with dead and rotting bodies. Lovely thing to be thinking about at the current time. I picked my way through, avoiding any thoughts about dead bodies. Crap, I just thought about it again. I was wading past a garbage bag when my backpack suddenly felt heavier. I stopped, opened it up and saw a jackhammer in there. I certainly did not own one of those. I looked up and saw red light gleaming through the cracks. I heard voices filtering through. One was raspy and evil, the other a very familiar one. Kat! I knew I didn't have the capabilities to float up there to crack the ceiling. Then, the rats came in a huge wave. They were all pushing up against the wall to get into the section of the sewer that I was in. When they saw me, they squeaked and scurried to me. I tried to run away but these rats were fast. They circled around my leg but didn't bite or climb.

"Human," one of them said.

"Agh!" I shrieked, shaking my leg around vigorously.

"Stop! We are friends of Kat," it said.

"You know Kat?" I asked, stopping my frantic movements.

"Yes."

"Are you one of her fictional characters?"

"No. But we are in the book series Warriors. I speak human as well," it said. I vaguely remembered Firestar's quest to rebuild SkyClan and rats were taking over the place they were intended to inhabit.

"But you're evil."

"Do you want our help or not?" it said exasperated.

"Yes," I said. They surged away from me and attached themselves against the wall. They began stacking on top of each other, forming a huge mountain of writhing rats. Disgusting.

"Climb on," it said, but I didn't know where he was, since his friends looked exactly like him and his voice echoed across the sewer. I put one foot at a time on top of them until I reached the top. I pulled out the jackhammer with all of my strengths and aimed it upward. It whirred to life and drilled into the ceiling. Bits started crumbling down and the rats began to scatter. The drill was stuck in the ceiling as I fell, losing my support. I splashed back in the water, alone. The drill eventually died. I noticed a large crack spreading across the ceiling. That's not good. I followed it to see what was going to happen. Suddenly, the ceiling opened up and someone fell through. I easily caught them and was so proud of myself. Then they tried to get away and slapped me hard. I dropped them and held my hand to my burning face.

"Ow!" I exclaimed.

"Oh. It's just you, Finn," they said. It was Kat.

Me: Finally rescued me. About time! I was still stuck in the Inner Sanctum for like two chapters!

Finn: You're slow with getting to the point.

Me: And this will NOT be the end of Character Academy. More things will come, this is only the first problem in many issues the school will face. The Bracelet is a big part of it.

Finn: I'm hungry.

Me: MEATLOAF!

Finn: MEATLOAF! Yummm.

Me: I don't know why people don't like meatloaf.

Finn: For example, your sister.

Me: -shakes head- No sense…

**If you got this far and are reading this, congratulations! You can read!**

**Crowd: -uproarious applause-**

**Yes, they are still here. They're my slaves now…**

**Read & Review! Well, you've read it, so now review it!**


	12. Chapter 12

Me: Ohs noes!

Finn: -cries-

Me: We're going on a cruise this week… on Saturday and be gone for a WHOLE WEEK!

Finn: No internet= no Fanfiction!

Me: Hopefully the Teen Club place has Wifi. They also have a library.

Finn: If you've been on the Carnival Dream, tell us if there's Wifi. Or no fanfictions next week and you will all die of boredom.

Chapter 12

_Kat POV_

Finn was holding his face in his hands and rubbing at the sore spot.

"Why did you do that?" he exclaimed. I shrugged.

"It seemed right. At the time."

"Well, it was wrong!" he yelled, his voice echoing around the sewer.

"Glad you found me, finally, where are we?" I asked.

"Under Broadway. Your friends from the Warriors series helped me." I paused for a moment.

"The cats?"

"No, rats."

"Oh! Okay! I'll send them a gift basket later," I said cheerfully. "Do you want me to heal that or something?"

"Yes! Wait, will it hurt?" he asked, letting me approach it. I thought for a second.

"Probably not," I touched it and prepared to do the spell.

"Probably?" he said, bewildered.

"Hocus Pocus, Abrakadabra, Alakazam… Hand Sanitizer!" I noticed the swelling and his face color going back to normal. "Told you it wouldn't hurt," I said, looking behind us.

"No, you said it would probably…"

"How do we get out?" I interrupted him.

"That way," he pointed behind him and we started sloshing through the dirty water. I heard a loud splash behind me, but figured it was us. It was relatively silent on our trip out which made things awkward. Finn sneezed and we both said at the same time, "Bless you." He stopped abruptly.

"I didn't sneeze."

"Neither did I," I admitted. I glanced behind us and saw a huge figure looming a few meters away. I tapped Finn's shoulder urgently.

"What?"

"There's something over there," I said, pointing to the object moving closer. Some lights began to hit the thing and I saw its scaly skin.

"It's the Tick Tock Crocodile from Peter Pan," I said. "Graduating class of… 2003, I think." The crocodile made a growling noise.

"It's me, Kat!" I said. It blinked and didn't say anything. "The principal?" He nodded and stood up on his hind legs.

"Hello Kat," he said in a raspy voice. Finn remained silent behind me.

"How are you doing?" I asked him.

"Quite good. I've made many friends down here. I'd like to make more."

"That's… nice…" I said, kind of scared of his strange tone.

"Why don't you come back to my place for a cup of bl… ack tea?" I had the feeling that black tea wasn't what he was planning on saying.

"Mrg!" I heard behind me. Was Finn trying to communicate with me?

"Not now," I said vaguely.

"MRG!" he exclaimed, louder this time. There was splashing and grumbles behind me. Okay, time to see what he was doing behind me. I turned and saw… nothing. Nobody was there.

"Finn?" I called, sloshing a bit forward. I turned back to Tick Tock Croc, as we called him, and saw that he was gone as well. Oh no. Tick Tock Croc took Finn! I looked up, the way we came, and then some. Where did they go?

_Finn POV_

If you've ever tried to get Kat's attention, you know how hard it is. You have to juggle knives for her to acknowledge you. That's why my only form of communication was 'Mrg!' because of someone speaks a random word, she listens. Unfortunately, that did not work.

"Not now," she said. What was happening at the moment? you might ask. Well, as I watched Kat chat with her buddy, the EVIL crocodile from Peter Pan, some of his friends wrapped me in duct tape and began to drag me underwater.

"MRG!" I exclaimed, louder, trying to get her attention but I was too late. They pulled me under. They weren't drowning me, though, they opened up a hatch and shoved me in. It was like a garbage chute, minus the garbage, thank goodness, and I landed in a pool of water. I struggled to the surface, still tied up with duct tape. Someone pulled me out and I saw Second from the Missing Series by Margaret Peterson Haddix standing there.

"Hello Finn! Sorry for the mishaps of getting you here, Kat would never agree to let you go on your own, so here you are! Evil Witch, please untie Mr. Whitman." The Evil Witch from Snow White began to unwrap the duct tape obediently.

"Want an apple?" she asked innocently.

"No soliciting dearie," Second said. The old lady frowned and backed away. A bunch of Disney villains and other book series villains stepped out, including the Queen of Hearts and her card soldiers. I was surrounded.

"Die!" someone shouted from the back. Second motioned for him to shut up.

"I have to go to the back room to… get things in order. Do whatever you like with him." With that, Second left.

"Wait! They could kill…" I said, but trailed off when I realized Second couldn't hear me. What do I do now? I remember just reading the most recent Missing book, Torn, and hearing that Second predicted all decisions before they were made. The villains yelled and shook their weapons and charged at me, standing in the middle of the concrete room underneath a sewer, with Kat nowhere to be found.

Me: Will Finn go into DHI mode?

Finn: Will Kat ever find her missing green pen?

Me: I know it's here somewhere… -looks under papers-

Finn: Stay tuned to Character Academy! Coming next week, or the week after!

Me: You never know.

Finn: Character Academy: What A Musical Day? Is that what we're planning for the next chapter?

Me: Here's a sneak peak…

"I once dreamed of becoming a star! And traveling near and far! But sadly, I'm stuck in. This. Pit. Of DEATH!" The Muses appeared and

Finn: That's all you get.

Me: Be left with a cliffhanger…

**Read and Review! Remember… Does the Carnival Dream have Wifi?**


	13. Chapter 13

Me: WHAAAT? Character Academy update? On a Thursday? Obsurd!

Finn: Happy Birthday! Yes it's your birthday.

Me: Two Character Academys in one week?

Finn: We took pity on you.

Chapter 13

_Kat POV_

Where was Finn? I remembered the crocodile always trying to eat people for a few years. That made me even more hysterical, thinking that Finn had already been eaten.

"Gar!" I yelled, stomping my shoes into the murky water. I heard a squeaking noise and swiveled my head to see the rats from SkyClan crawling up the walkways.

"Hey guys! You know that guy that you helped earlier?" The lead rat twitched his whiskers at me.

"Lawrence?"

"Yes! He got taken by crocodiles and I need to find him…"

"Psh. Crocodiles are too… bleh. Let's go," the rats started to scurry away before I realized alligators made them mad for some reason.

"Uh! Wait! I mean, uh, alligators! Alligators took… Lawrence!" They stopped and turned to me.

"Alligators?" he said, his voice rising with anger. "I HATE ALLIGATORS! Where did you last see Lawrence?" I smiled to myself and pointed in the spot where Finn had been taken.

"Swim, minions! Swim!" the rats went under for a few moments before popping up and squeaking Ratalian, the language of rats, before the main one spoke to me.

"There's a hatch underneath the water. You will find Lawrence there. KILL ALLIGATORS!" he growled before the disappeared down the sewer. I reached down into the water and felt the hatch lift . I looked down and saw the faint outline of it through the water. I stuck my feet in and sailed down the chute where, to my confusion, I heard singing.

_Finn POV_

"Um, guys, couldn't we talk this out?" I asked.

"No!" they chorused.

"Oh come _on_!" I exclaimed. "Let me live? I have dreams in the future! Haven't you guys dreamt of something?" I asked. It was meant to be ignored but they all froze and looked at me. A Viking-looking guy stepped forward. He raised his battle axe up and let it clatter to the floor.

"Hit it, Ed!" he said. Mr. Ed, the dancing horse, was sitting by a radio and hit the _play_ button.

"I dreamed of becoming a prodigy!" he sang. He sat down at the piano and began to play. "My mother would be so proud of me! I once dreamed that I would be the next Mozart, or Bach! But all I can ever be is mean! A Viking!" I stared as everyone in the room began to sing in unison.

"We all have dreams! We all have dreams! We sleep all night until our dreams burst at the seams, yes we have dreams! We all have dreams! And then we transfer over to…"

"The Big Bad Wolf!" he roared. He cleared his throat and began to sing as well. "I dreamed of falling in love!" all the females in the room sighed. "And giving my new beau a dove! I once dreamed that I would be desired! But all I could ever be is rough. The Big Bad Wolf!"

"We all have dreams! We all have dreams! We sleep all night until our dreams burst at the seams, yes we have dreams!" they continued the chorus and a few more villains came up and sang. It was weird, because everyone happened to know the lyrics like they had rehearsed this before. I just stood there as they all sang before me. Then, they broke into a choreographed dance while singing and jumping and knocking over chairs. Smee came up.

"I dreamed of becoming a great sea captain! Sailing from Greenland to London! I once dreamed I would be the next Blackbeard, or Captain Hook," he added in quickly as a pirate glared at him. "But all I can ever be is clumsy and hope to impress my mumsy. First Mate Smee!" They broke into chorus again and Smee spun the evil witch from Snow White in a circle at the same time as everyone else. I edged towards the exit, hoping to go unnoticed but someone saw me.

"What's your dream?" they asked me. Mr. Ed stopped the music and it was totally silent. Was I supposed to sing? Oh great.

"I dreamed of becoming the leader of our nation," I sang. This was really awkward. There was no music. I jumped on the nearest table for the next line. "Standing on a podium tall and proud!" On cue, everyone said, "Hail to the Chief!"

"I feel the world could need some changing and the dinosaur sites need excavating. If there was a chance I would be somehow!" I said. I began to get into it and totally forgetting that I was singing.

"Somehow!" they all crowed and the Muses began humming to the music that had just been turned back on.

"If I could be chief of the United States, I would never stand for polluted lakes! I would clean them all if I could, and giving the homeless house supplies like wood!" I noticed out of the corner of my eye a movement that I would later realize as Kat. "Only if, too many ifs, if I could lead the nation! Finnegan Whitman!" The broke into chorus and they lifted me off my table and lead me to a stage that had mysteriously appeared. They danced with me as I was sent to the stage. Blackbeard was lighted up my colorful spotlights and background dancers.

"I once dreamed of becoming a star! And traveling near and far! But sadly, I'm stuck in," he sang. Suddenly, the background dancers were playing extreme saxophone and jazz music, making a loud sound after every word he said. "This. Pit. Of DEATH!" The Muses appeared and sung with him. After the note ended and the music ceased playing, everyone was clapping, cheering and whistling. I turned and saw Kat staring at me from across the room. I was glad she rescued me, but wondered if she saw me sing. She smiled at me, meaning she did.

Me: Finn wants to be the president! Sorry my part was short! It's apparent that Finn's POV was more important.

Finn: I can't believe you made me sing.

Me: Heh. You still sing in the shower.

Finn: How would you know that?

Me: You're very loud. I also think you use my hairbrush as a microphone.

Finn: -blushing furiously- Stop it! I'm signing off!

Me: Wait NOO-

**R & R? See you all tomorrow! Then the week after next!**


	14. Chapter 14

Me: Yay! We're back! And I have a sore throat…

Finn: I DON'T! Haha!

Me: -kicks shin-

Finn: OW! –runs away-

Me: -whispers really fast- There will be a few more secret chapters of Song Fics until Finn finds out again.

Finn: What are you whispering about?

Me: Just how weird you are.

Chapter 14

_Kat POV_

It was kind of a freak show underneath the sewer. I slid in on a chute and found a whole musical going on. Maleficent and Smee were doing some ballet thing, doing it at the exact same time as everyone else in the room. Finn stood in the middle, looking awkward. Someone shouted,

"What's your dream?" and the music playing stopped and everyone stared at Finn. He froze for a moment before belting out a few notes nervously. And then he warmed up. He was singing like crazy and the villains all loved it. They all knew the lyrics and lifted him off the table that he had just jumped on. Blackbeard started singing and I began slowly waking up from my confused state. Finn sang? That's… new. The song ended and confetti and colorful lights rained down. I stared at Finn as he turned smiling, and then he saw me. His smile faded and he looked nervous again. I could almost read his mind. _Did she hear me sing?_ I smiled and nodded, _Yes_. He cringed and walked towards me.

"Hi Kat," he said.

"Kind of like High School Musical in here," I said. He nodded sheepishly.

"You want to be president?"

"Um, no that was just… so I wouldn't be killed!" he said. My, he was getting better at lying.

"Almost as good as me," I sighed.

"What?"

"Let's go," I walked back behind the chute so the still-applauding audience didn't see us. I grabbed Finn's arm and spoke the spell to take us home.

"HOCUS POCUS ABRAKADABRA, ALAKAZAM, MANDARIN ORANGES!" When I opened my eyes, we were standing in my office. Taffy was typing away and didn't seem to notice that we had come back. Silvia was walking out of my office with a fresh cup of coffee, about to never see the world again. When she saw us, she dropped the coffee and it splattered on the carpet, and the Styrofoam cup lay in the puddle. I straightened up and jumped down from the waiting table and walked up to her, sighing.

"Silvia, dear, don't be messy. Get Randy here, please Taffy," I said.

"On it," he said, still typing on the computer and talking on the glow-phone at the same time. I stepped around a gaping Silvia and went into my office. Alfred the Potato was sitting on my intercom.

"Kat!" he squeaked in surprise. "You're back!"

"Yeah," I said nonchalantly, batting him slightly away from the PA system. I had to inform the 'partying' school that the principal was back.

_Finn POV_

Kat didn't seem to harp on my singing too much, which either meant I was really good, or she was going to murder me with it later. We landed on the waiting table on a bunch of People magazines stacked up neatly. At least the office was somewhat in order. Taffy wasn't gushing over Delaney and the school was still standing. I looked out the window and saw a few ripped pieces of cloth on corners of the brick and some streamers hanging from the ceiling. Kat got down from the table and told Silvia the Vampire to not be so messy and commanded Taffy to call Randy to clean up the coffee mess. I got down and went out the door to see the school. The first I went in was 15A, Dionysus' psychology class, 1st, 3rd, 5th, and 7th class of the day and found it dark and empty. The PA system clicked to life.

"Attention students of Character Academy!" Kat's voice rang loudly. "Yes, it is I, your principal, Kat. Finn and I have returned from our, ahem, quest and are preparing to end all your partying that's happened since our absence. I wish you all luck and details of whereabouts are not to be given. Please standby for further announcements. Thank you!" it clicked off and I could almost imagine how the students in their trailer felt about ending their parties. I stepped out, now convinced that every classroom was empty. I went by 30B when I saw light streaming in from the bottom crack. I opened the door silently and peeked through. I fumbled with my hands to close the door quietly and as fast as I could, heart pounding. It was Candice and her minions, new recruits probably, packing stuff in backpacks. Maybe when Kat and I left, they lived in the classroom. It was dark and Candice was sleeping in the corner. Her minions were most likely packing for her, facing away from the door. I opened it again and closed it silently behind me.

"Hey Louis? Pass me the compass." A fat alligator with a saxophone case handed him an old-fashioned compass. I looked at the desk where Candice was sleeping and saw The Bracelet hanging around her thin green wrist. I tiptoed forward as she snored loudly. Louis snorted and continued packing stuff. I began to unclasp the bracelet and she stopped snoring suddenly. My chest tightened and I froze after jerking my hands away. She continued snoring and I relaxed a bit. I slowly pulled The Bracelet away and practically fled out the door, running like a maniac, screaming "AHHHH!" down the hall. I heard a faint voice in the classrooms behind me as I ran for the safety of Kat's office.

"AH! GET HIM, YOU MORONS!"

Me: I almost put Chapter 10, this story has come prêt-ty far.

Finn: We have to go look for a rubber bracelet that Kat lost before the cruise.

Me: It's around here somewhere… -picks up stapler- -looks underneath it-

Finn: Since she prefers not to talk, she just points where we look.

Me: -points to the stapler-

Finn: -sigh- It's not under there.

Me: -points to basketball-

Finn: Not there either.

Me: -scratches head- -points to Finn-

Finn: What? Oh. No, I did not take it.

Me: -sigh-

**Read and Review! I need an idea for the next adventure of Kat and Finn, coming soon since we have to get rid of an annoying cucumber.**

Candice: -appears- ZUCCHINI! –disappears-

**She is so rude. See you on Wednesday hopefully! If not, I'm bombed with homework. Gotta love high school –sarcasm-**


	15. Chapter 15

Me: Finally. Sorry about last week, I'm a slacker.

Finn: We also were handling the new account, JustKatatonic. Tons of reviews already, Create an OC.

Me: I don't feel like explaining, so go look at see.

Finn: I disapprove.

Me: I don't know why he does. If he tells me, it makes no sense.

Finn: It's weird! You kind of kicked me out of this new account.

Me: Nope! Let's not talk about this here. Get on with it.

Finn: But, I…

Chapter 15

_Kat POV_

After the oh-so-devastating announcement considering school starting up again, I sat down in my chair and finished filling out forms that I was supposed to do last week, but I was kind of busy. Taffy came in, holding a Double Chocolate Chip Frappucino from Starbuck and set it down on my desk.

"Thanks, Taffy." I don't know what I'd do without him.

"Anytime. Sorry for the temporary off-job last week. Sickness going around, which Apollo healed successfully."

"That's fine. What happened in my absence?"

"Well, Silvia tried to take over your job, but everyone refused. I don't think she's a likely candidate, do you?" he raised an eyebrow. I shook my head.

"Very well. Also, the Easter Bunny dropped by. Gave me this package," Taffy pulled out an Easter egg shaped box and put it on my desk. As he turned to leave, I heard Finn go screaming through the office.

"AHHHH!" Taffy looked at me. I looked at him. We both bolted for the door to see what was happening. Finn ran right by us carrying something and appeared to have gone insane.

"Finn?" I called. He saw me, his eyes widened and ran towards me, panting.

"Candice… more people… I saw… then… pencil sharpener… I ran… they chased… and I was…" he said. I stared at him for a moment. Taffy looked at him for a second before speaking.

"He saw Candice and she had more people with her and he saw the Bracelet, then he grabbed it and ran. They saw him so they chased him and he was scared he would get caught because he doesn't know how to use the Bracelet." I stared at him. He shrugged and left. I stood there for a moment before sitting down in my spinny chair and sipped my frappucino.

"Is he right?" I asked. Finn nodded. I extended my hand and he dropped the Bracelet into it. I attached it to my wrist and stood up.

"Okay, we're going on an adventure, Finn," I said. We had to go to the dungeon to see someone quite important, someone who knew what was going on with Candice.

"I'm tired of adventures," he whined.

"Too bad," I said. "Do it or I'll zap you, because I know how to use this thing," He sighed and got up.

"Water?" he asked. I sighed.

"Fine." I walked out and he followed me, humming a song that sounded strangely like the one he had contributed to in the sewer.

_Finn POV_

I drank as long as hard as I could when Kat was practically boring holes in my head and tapping her foot anxiously. She's probably the shortest, converse-wearing principal in history, but she was still pretty threatening. Today, she was wearing her dinosaur shirt, where one T-Rex said to another, "I love you this much!" and the other said, "That's not very much," because T-Rexes are notorious for having short arms. She'd probably still beat me up. I stood up and wiped my mouth.

"Okay, let's go," I said. Kat marched down the hallway. I don't know if you know this but Kat walks really fast, so I was jogging to keep up with her. She came to a part of the wall underneath the stairs with a not-so-hidden door conspicuously painted the same color as the wall. She pulled out her key ring, flipped about twenty keys and singled out one, which she inserted and twisted and an eyepad popped out. No, not an iPad, an eyepad or eye scanner. She stared into it until it clicked. Then a microphone came out.

"Kat," she said. A huge machine gun slid out of the wall and pointed at me.

"And Finn," she added. The machine gun went away and the door automatically opened.

"Lots of security, I suppose," I said, trying to wipe off my half-death experience.

"Don't worry," Kat said as we walked down the long hallway, lit dimly by prison-like lights. "The machine gun wasn't loaded."

"Oh! Thank goodness," I said, feeling better. We approached another door, which opened, again, automatically opening.

"The pistols, grenades and smoke bombs after were loaded," she said. And the door opened.

Me: Uh oh, what's in there?

Finn: Bit of a Kat lesson there.

Me: I do have that dinosaur shirt. And people complain because I walk too fast.

Finn: Did anyone catch the The Incredibles hint in there?

Me: Go look. If not… Ed. Na. Mode.

Finn: Famous quote there.

Me: It will be in history forever.

Finn: Don't forget…

Me: You can email me!

Crowd: -uproarious applause-

Finn: 

Me: Yay! Contact me! If you feel like it.

Finn: Until Wednesday when JustKatatonic is posted without me… -sniff-

Me: Later!

**Read and Review? Yep, you can email me. Finn responds too. If it's for him only, put in the subject line, 'To Finn Only'. I won't read it. Sometimes. No promises! And another, be sure to check out JustKatatonic! Good stuff, Finn's not speaking. He'll make a cameo, sometimes. And for Catluver3, check out her stuff! All are Kingdom Keepers orient! Reading one of them right now, go say that Kat and Finn say hi. Okay, bye!**


	16. Chapter 16

Me: Sorry about last week.

Finn: It's her fault, I swear.

Me: SHUT IT. –whacks with celery-

Finn: Get on with the chapter, we have to go to bed NOW1 

Me: No one asked you. –growls-

Chapter 16

_Kat POV_

The door opened and I lead Finn down the row of cells, each filled with two prisoners.

"Who are these people?" he asked, stopping to poke through Cell #24, containing a lion and a rainbow colored zebra.

"Don't do that!" I yelled, pulling his fingers away before the zebra attacked.

"He's carnivorous and loves the taste of human flesh," I said, slapping the zebra from the outside of the cage.

"A… carnivorous zebra?"

"My imagination. Made in… 2009, I believe. Joined Candice's army in 2010."

"So… every single one of these creatures are thought up of by you?" he asked. I nodded.

"And they all joined Candice's army?" he asked. I nodded again.

"But when I saw her, she had barely anything left to fight with!" Finn exclaimed, following my brisk pace as I continued walking again.

"That was just the remainder. Every single one of these animals-slash-things were part of her army," I said, going through another door.

"But what about… Is that… Aslan? From Narnia?" he interrupted himself. I looked into the cage he was aiming at, and sure enough. Aslan stalked around his cage.

"Yeah, that's him," I replied.

"But he's not even yours! And he's good, right?"

"I know he's not mine, but he joined Candice's army, which makes him a prisoner." We walked by another cage, Cell #136, and I saw Second twiddling his thumbs. _George and Alfred must've gotten him. _He disappeared in a flash of light, then returned again. _And Broomhilda. _The walls were made cinderblocks and filled with titanium. It was also made of anti-power brick, especially because Magneto loved to mess with the stuff, with his magical powers.

"Hey!" Second jumped up when he saw us and grasped the cage bars.

"What now?" I grumbled.

"The Invisible Man hates me, and has threatened to kill me! Get me into another cell please!" he begged. Finn glanced at me.

"Fine," he said at the same time I said, "No way." He glared at me, knowing I had authority here. My vote counts 3 times more than his.

"The Invisible Man is in Cell #912. You're all by yourself. Nimrod," I said, before continuing our way down the corridor.

_Finn POV_

"I didn't know that! If I knew that, I would've agreed!"

"I don't care, Finn!"

"Then why are you so…"

"Because he influenced you! You of all people should know that when someone evil asks to be moved, they're going to try an escape, doing whatever possible to do so! The fact that he brain-washed you was why I don't care!" Kat snapped, walking faster than before. There was a silence while what she had said sunk in.

"The reason he's by himself is…?"

"Because he influences people's choices. I stuck him with Janus twice before and I regret it."

"Who's Janus?" I asked.

"God of choices and decisions. Greek," she replied. She went up to one cell, and pressed a red button. The fact that the button was red made me concerned. A loud buzzer rang and Gandalf stepped out of the walls and walked in.

"YOU SHALL NOT PASS!" he screamed before leading Pinocchio out of the cell. He closed it quickly and took Pinocchio through the wall. Kat walked in behind him. I stared at the wall for a moment before closing my eyes and walking in too.

"Ow!" Kat yelled. I opened my eyes and found that I had slammed her into a wall.

"Sorry. Has this always been here?"

"Yeah, so has the dungeon. We call it, Interrogation Room #5.5," she said before following the elderly wizard-thing from Lord of the Rings. He pushed Pinocchio into a closed room and sat down in a wheelchair, with a large mirror-slash-camera square in front.

"Who wants to interrogate?" Cinderella asked quietly. I turned and saw her wearing a blouse, skirt, and heels, like she was dressed up for a job interview. She had a microphone hanging on her ear and following her jawline towards her mouth.

"What are you doing?" I asked. My question didn't sound so specific, but she understood.

"I'm hosting the school news today! Dress to impress!" she giggled. She stopped suddenly and whispered in my ear,

"Also, today's fancy day in Aphrodite's class." I sighed and nodded. I turned to ask Kat if I could interrogate, but she was already in the room, having left me behind. I frowned and sat in the chair next to Gandalf, watching the interrogation sullenly.

Me: Is Finn pouting?

Finn: No! I just… wanted to interrogate Pinocchio.

Me: So is Pinocchio…

Finn: Evil?

Me: No… is Pinocchio…

Finn: Planning on assassinating you?

Me: NO. You made me forget what I was going to say.

Readers/Viewers: BOOO! –throwing tomatoes at Finn-

Finn: AGH! –ducks-

Me: They wanted to hear what I was going to say!

Finn: Remember… -ducks- Please! –jumps-

Me: Ummmm….

Yoga Instructors: Ommm….

Me: SHUT UP.

Readers/Viewers: BOOO! –throwing tomatoes at Finn-

Me: I remember! It's…

Annoying Kid: -coughs loudly-

**Read and Review? BOOO to the kid who coughed. And also, questions to ponder over… what was I going to say? GUESS. Not the brand of purses, but guess what I was going to say. And also for the **_**muy inteligente… **_**(Very intelligent in Spanish) … What do you say to someone who coughs? Burp=Excuse you/me, Sneeze=Bless you… what do you say…? Make It up if you feel like.**

"**Olive oil!" Amanda exclaimed, after my fifth coughing fit.**

**Like that. Random, but copyrighted. Okay, I'm done now! See you Friday!**


	17. Chapter 17

Me: YAY! I technically finished my homework.

Finn: We still have to organize her Psychology binder. Where we have to have all 27 things. And we don't know where ten of those are.

Me: SHUT UP. –whacks with celery- I'll find them.

Finn: OF course you will. –sarcasm-

Me: I'll tase you!

Chapter 17

_Kat POV_

"Hey Pinocchio," I started off the interrogation.

"Am I free?" he asked.

"Um, no. I'd like to ask you a few questions, if you don't mind."

"Actually I do." His nose didn't grow, so he must have minded, but I didn't care.

"It's about Candice. We have her in the next room and she won't talk. But if you talk, I can _mention_ to the staff about giving you the magic fairy who turns you into a real boy. Clear?" He nodded enthusiastically.

"Candice! The shape-shifting zucchini loves the color orange and her favorite movie is…"  
>"No! Not that! Real info! Spy info!" I exclaimed. He looked down.<p>

"Oh."

"Real boy…" I coaxed.

"Fine, fine," he sighed in his high-pitched voice.

"What is she plotting to do next?"

"She wants to recruit a specific person who has secret evil intentions and have them higher up so they can commit a jailbreak and free all us prisoners. She needs someone of upper class to get in without being seen," Pinocchio confessed. I glanced at the mirror, aka the window, where Finn and Gandalf were behind.

"When do you expect something like this to happen?" I asked, crossing my fingers underneath the metal table, hoping it would be _Oh, maybe sometime next year _or _Oh, next month. At the least_, but all I got was,

"Sometime next week. She told me ALL about it during our last visit."

"She visited you?"

"Yeah, as Gepetto." I facepalmed as I realized what he was talking about. Candice transformed into Gepetto and visited Pinocchio. I reminded myself to talk to the Three Fates or the Oracle for something useful. I considered any question I could ask while he was honest. Which happened to be most of the time.

"Do you know who she is going to convert?" I asked. Pinocchio looked down, not responding.

"Who is it, Pinocchio?" I asked quietly, but also angrily as well. Silence.

"Who is it?" I yelled, slamming my fists down on the metal table, creating an enormously loud noise echoing in the room.

"FI…" he started but trailed off.

"Tell me, or the deal's off," I said.

"Oh, you won't like it."

"I already don't like this."

"She wants to convert Finn." I gaped at him, noticing his nose wasn't growing and stormed out of the room.

"FINNEGAN WHITMAN!" I yelled. He was eating a doughnut with Cinderella, laughing.

"Hi Kat, how'd the interrogation go?" he asked.

"Candice wants you to join her army," I said.

"What? Why would you say that?"

"Pinocchio said so."

"You can't believe him!"

"His nose didn't grow! Finn, you better not convert! And stay away from fatty foods, those are bad for you." I took the doughnut from him and Cinderella and ate them both.

"Why did you do that?" he yelled back.

"I don't want you getting fat!" I said loudly.

"I'm perfectly capable of taking care of myself, _Mom_."

"Oh, so now you're calling me old, huh? Guess you forgot I'm your KIDNAPPER!"

"Maybe I will convert! Maybe to get away from you, I will help Candice conquer the school!" he said. I gasped.

"You wouldn't!"

"I would!"

"No you won't."

"Wanna bet?"

"Yeah. Twenty bucks says you won't," I challenged.

"What if I leave right now to see Candice?"

"Who said you were leaving?" I asked. Gandalf and Dumbledore appeared out of nowhere and dragged him off.

"KAT! Where are they taking me? KAT!" he was yelling as he was dragged away. I turned to tell Cinderella to get lost, but who I saw was not Cinderella at all.

_Finn POV_

"KAT! Where are they taking me? KAT!" I was yelling gibberish and magical spells I heard her speak but Dumbledore and Gandalf didn't seem fazed. I struggled as hard as I could before concentrating on turning into hologram form. I became light quickly and flew out of their grasp, running as far away from them as possible. A red alarm rang and the hall flooded with security people, all grabbing at me, but swiping through me. I knew I couldn't maintain it long, so I dashed down one way where there was a glowing sign that read EXIT. I was surprised when there was nothing but a stone wall and a tiny window. I turned around and saw a door swing close behind me. The tens of security staff who had tried to catch me laughed hysterically and threw rotten fruit at me. Then they started throwing feathers that surprisingly seemed to go wherever they threw it, instead of flailing around in the wind. The feathers then transformed into spears as they tried to kill me.

"AGH!" I was yelling when I woke up. I looked calmly at my surroundings and saw that I was still in a stone cell, but no feather-spears, or anything. A guard stood out in the hall, directly to my left.

"Hey!" I hissed. The guy turned and saw a huge Copyright sign on his T-Shirt. "Who are you?"

"Luisphant Masterson," he replied proudly.

"Again, who are you?"

"A mortal hero of great destiny from Greece, back to assist the demigods," he insisted.

"And where… oh. You're from Create An OC, aren't you?" I asked. He nodded.

"Well, I was mistakingly thrown in here, so if you could…"

"Silence mortal!"

"You're a mortal too."

"I'm a god compared to you! I will phone in Master Kat to see you!" he picked up a glow-phone and dialed a number.

"What?" Kat's voice said irritated.

"This boy wants to see you, Master," Luisphant said.

"Who?"

"Prisoner #1063."

"Hold on…" I heard shuffling paper through the earpiece. "Finn?"

"He has stopped his incessant screaming," Luisphant informed.

"Good. I was getting too many complaints. What does he want? Put him on." Luisphant handed the phone to me.

"Hi, Kat," I said timidly.

"Suppose you're going to apologize now, huh? Well I just had a run in with Candice. Cinderella was at the ball with the prince when you were talking with her."

"The shape-shifting zucchini strikes again," I mumbled.

"Right. Until I find Candice again and put her behind bars, I'm going to have to leave you in the dungeon so she can't enslave you or whatever. Okay?"

"You're LEAVING me here?"

"Yup. Have a good day! I'll catch her soon. Bye!" and Kat hung up.

Me: Aww, Finny is locked up in a jail cell.

Finn: Lots of prisoners I see, if I'm Number 1063.

Me: Yeah, Candice gets around.

Finn: So, Luisphant?

Me: Submitted to me by LuisphantPM.

Finn: Does he even read these?

Me: Maybe only JustKatatonic. I don't know. If you are reading this, say hi!

Finn: Hi!

Me: Are you Luisphant?

Finn: Well, no…

Me: Then, shut it.

**Read and Review! Also, check out the story where you get to write to me, the Keepers, Amanda, or Jez in the fantastic new story, Letters to the DHI! I update tomorrow so review! I'm a wee bit desperate. And tired. CHOCOLATE DRUNK! Heh… I haven't had chocolate in a while, actually. So, maybe CHOCOLATE DEPRIVED? Yeah, whatever. See you on Friday! Or tomorrow if you read Letters to the DHI!**


	18. Chapter 18

Me: Yellow!

Finn: For a second, it sounded like you were naming a color.

Me: Well, technically..

Gale: It does.

Me: -gasp- Who is this 'Gale', you ask? How dare you.

Finn: Gale from Hunger Games.

Me: TEAM GALE! –cheers-

Gale: Thank.. you?

Finn: He's her husband.

Gale: I don't even remember the ceremony!

Me: Neither do I!

Finn: What?

Chapter 18

_Kat POV_

"Hey Cinderella," I said glumly. She was all happy because she and the prince had a nice time at the dance, you know, where she was supposed to be before Candice showed up.

"Hi!" she said cheerfully, skipping down the hallway, then getting screamed at by Silvia for running. Then Delaney showed up, yelling at Silvia for yelling at Cinderella for doing nothing in particular. It was chaos. At least that was normal. Taffy popped out of the office and handed me a printed out e-mail.

**Subject: All Alone…**

**From: **

**Hey Kat!**

**I'm all alone in here with my creepy friend Frodo who, by the way, ripped up a pillow yesterday, loves macadamia nuts. Send someone our way! I need some sanity!**

**Death and Torture to All,**

** Set, #534**

I groaned. How did he get a hold of e-mail? Who gave him a computer in the first place? I went into the office to see a stranger working at Taffy's desk.

"Hello…?" I said.

"Hey," he said regularly. I glared at him.

"No, it's 'hey' when you talk to someone of equal importance. It's 'hello' when you meet me. Now who the heck are you?" The guy looked up at me, and I stared at him expectantly.

"I'm Surge," he said. I sighed.

"Where are you from, purge?"

"Surge."

"Same thing."

"I'm an escaped mutant," he said proudly. He stood back and unfolded maginificent white wings. I guess he expected me to start clapping, which I did, sarcastically.

"Lovely, dear. Now what are you doing in my office?"

"I'm a substitute."

"For who?"

"For Taffy."

"What? Why? I just saw him a second ago!"

"He left 'just a second ago'. I'm secretary for someone named… Ka… Ta…. K…"

"Kat," I interrupted.

"Yeah!"

"That would be me," I said.

"Really?" he said, genuinely surprised. I rolled my eyes.

"Now call Gandalf and tell him I'm visiting a few prisoners, Finnegan Whitman specifically."

"Sure thing!" he picked up the phone and hit the purple button.

"Gandalf? What's up bro?" I sighed. I could almost hear Gandalf's confusion.

"Let me talk to him," I said. I took the phone from him to hear a magic spell being spoken through the other end.

"NO! Stop!" I yelled. Gandalf shut up, and so did everyone in the office.

"What? Kat! Who is that insane hobbit?"

"That's Purge."

"Surge!" he protested.

"That," I replied.

"So what does Purge want?"

"I wanted to tell you I'm visiting Finn shortly. Can you send… um.. _help _in here to inform Surge of his new duties?" I asked innocently. Gandalf got the hint.

"I'll send in some… _help_, but are you sure everyone else is ready?"

"Of course they're not!" I put my hand over the speaker of the phone.

"HEY EVERYONE! HELP IS COMING!" I yelled. Suddenly, everyone had something to do, or somewhere to be. Everyone raced out every exit

"Why is everyone leaving?" Surge asked.

"Because they know that only the special to get to be alone with the help. And when I come back, I expect not a single change in this office. Do you hear me?"

"Yeah!" he said.

"Help can be rough sometimes…"

"Yeah?"

"Okay, I'm off! Help will be here shortly!" I left the office to head for the dungeons, wondering how Purge was going to handle Thing 1, Thing 2, Thing 3, Thing 4, Thing 5…

_Finn POV_

"You have a visitor," Luisphant said. He opened the door and my visitor entered.

"Kat!" I exclaimed. I tried to jump up, but of course, I was shackled.

"Why did you shackle him?" Kat asked Luisphant.

"Standard prisoner protocol," he said firmly.

"Unlock them."

"But that would be going against…"

"Need I remind you of who I am?" she sighed, like threatening was a last resort. Luisphant snapped his mouth shut and unlocked me from my bonds.

"Thank…" I began.

"Help me!" she hissed, like _she _had an issue being free and magical.

"What now?"

"It's Purge!"

"What?"

"Purge! I think he's Candice in disguise!"

"In case you forgot, I've been here for three hours, so I don't know who Purge is. What a bad name for a child. I don't even recognize the name."  
>"Well, his real name is Surge, but I'm calling him Purge," she admitted.<p>

"You don't like him? Who is he?"

"Well, he's _some _mutant. Maybe from some Maximum Ride thing. But anyway, he replaced Taffy."

"Taffy left?" I asked, surprised.

"No, he went on a short vacation. He deserves it, but I don't like this Purge guy." Taffy is Kat's favorite without-a-fanfic-OC in the world. He is calm, usually very smart, the step-brother of Legolas, who graduates next year, which Kat will be upset about, because… well, I guess she has a thing for elves.

"What makes you think he's Candice?"

"Well… nothing…"

"You just have a gut feeling, right?"

"Yeah!"

"I could help you, you know, if you let me out…"

"I can't do that, Finn, you know that," she scowled at me.

"Use me as bait! Use me as a ploy to get Candice out of hiding!" I pleaded. She sighed and started to head for the exit.

"I'll mull it over. Keep a watch. And if she gets you, remind yourself that 'What would Kat do?' And you know how I love… to _fly_," she said. She stepped out and walked down the corridor, her bootsteps echoing through the walls, and I was sealed in my cell as Luisphant closed the iron door with a _bang_.

Me: And yes, Set has an email.

Finn: I still can't believe you leave me in there.

Gale: I'm not the smartest guy, but I think that the advice to Finn about flying had something to do with Pe…

Me: NO! SH! You'll ruin my dastardly plan!

Finn: What would that be?

Gale: Peter…

Me: NO! –puts duct tape on Gale-

Gale: MRG!

Finn: Why did you duct tape your husband?

Me: He's not my husband, I just said that for fun.

Finn: Why…?

Me: You should've seen the look on your face when I told you! HA!

Finn: -sigh-

**Read and Review? What was Gale about to say before I duct taped him? Are you Team Gale or Team Peeta? –cough- Team Gale –cough- Hmm? What? I said nothing. I just have a bad coughing fit. Also, I haven't updated Letters to the DHI in a while, so letting you all know that it's being posted tomorrow. I hope. No promises!**


	19. Chapter 19

Me: DID YOUU know that NaNoWriMo STARTS TODAY?

Finn: Crap we're gonna die.

Me: I have 1929 words so far!

Finn: It's a new record!

Me: Sorry if I don't post my side stories, like Letters to the DHI or DHI Chatroom, like I used to.

Finn: You haven't given us our mail yet.

Me: SH! I'm working on it!

Chapter 19

_Kat POV_

I visited a few classrooms before heading back to my office, just to check the learning process. I do know, however, that teachers like to fake that they're teaching or fake nice until I leave and then turn into Satan. I 'visited' Harry Potter's dorm, #282, and stole his invisibility cloak. I put it on and used my Fanfiction powers to walk through the door without anyone noticing. I almost ran into Sam the Hobbit when he got up to sharpen his pencil. I darted around him and sat in the back, observing the teacher's ways. I noted that he need to more thoroughly explain some things, and if he didn't know how, I'd fire him. I could not have any more bogus teachers lounging around my school. I stepped out of the classroom and dialed Taffy's desk.

"Hello?" a raspy voice said. Screams of laughter echoed in the background.

"Hi Purge!" I said cheerfully.

"Kat! Hi!" he exclaimed, trying to compose himself.

"I'm on my way in a few! Remember, I want that office spotless!" I said, and hung up. As I made my way down towards the office, I thought about Taffy, how he had told the Help a bedtime story and they were gone and sleeping for an hour. Ah, how I missed that elf. I picked up my glow-phone and dialed Taffy's number.

"Hello?" he answered on the third ring.

"Hi Taffy! How's the vacation going?" I asked.

"Miss. Kat! The Bahamas are lovely this time of year. Oh thank you sir," he said, probably to a bartender. "Perhaps you should come along one day."

"Oh a vacation would be lovely," I said. "But you enjoy your time there, okay? Don't even think about…"

"ALERT! ALERT! ALERT!" the loud mechanical voice screamed across the school. The alarms blared and the lights flickered. My workers spilled out of doors, running around, trying to find the source of the problem.

"Miss. Kat? What is happening?" Taffy asked worriedly.

"Nothing! Nothing!" I tried to say. I saw Silvia running by, frantically screaming into her glow-phone. "Silvia! Status report!"

"Prisoners escaping from the dungeons!" she exclaimed. I gaped, forgetting that Taffy was on the other end of my phone.

"Miss. Kat? Prisoners are escaping? I'm coming back. Right now," he was saying when I tuned back in. "Waiter, bring we the check."

"Taffy! No! Stay!" I tried. He hung up. I sighed, and pocketed my phone. I looked down and saw I must've dropped the invisible cloak. I didn't have time to turn around. I wasn't really even thinking.

"FINN!" I yelled, running to the dungeons. George the Redcoat caught up.

"We caught a few escaping! Some escaped the grounds completely and the rest are somewhere in the school.

"I WANT THIS SCHOOL IN LOCKDOWN. STAT. I WANT EVERY STUDENT IN THEIR CURRENT ROOMS," I was practically yelling over the blare of the alarms.

"Yes ma'am!" he fell back to carry out my orders. What if they got Finn? What if he didn't get my reference? This is NOT happening.

_Finn POV_

The alarms blared loudly and I jumped to the front of my cell to ask Luisphant, but he was unconscious on the ground.

"Luisphant!" I exclaimed. I tried to reach him, stretching my arms through the bars to reach him when Kampê from Percy Jackson broke me free of my bars.

"Come on, boy," she hissed. I followed her, not eager to get burned alive.

"Uh, where are we going…?" I asked, trying to keep up with her stubby legs waddling through the hallways. I saw Broomhilda rolling through the gardens to get to us. If I could just stall her…

"On my back, boy," she said to me.

"Uh, I'm afraid… of heights?" I said.

"Get on, before I make you," she spat. I climbed on. As she took off, soaring over the giant hamster ball, I really wished that someone would catch us soon. Then, I saw someone on Aladdin's Magic Carpet flying towards us. Kat!

"You die today, loser," she sneered at the dragon thing I was riding.

"Never!" Kampê snarled. Kat raised her arm, aimed the Bracelet at her and said,

"Capture. POKEMON!" I don't know how that was supposed to work, but it did. Kampê screamed as she disappeared into the Bracelet.

"AGH!" I screamed as I freefell, since my only ride just got sucked into a bracelet. Carpet swooped down and Kat managed to catch me. She hauled me on. I was hyperventilating at my close death.

"Come on, let's go kill Candice's army!" she laughed at me and steered Carpet away and towards where Megatron was trying to hide behind Building 3.

Me: OH NO! They escaped! Short chapter, I know, but a lot happened.

Finn: Hopefully next Monday won't be Halloween.

Me: Yeah. Wait, what?

Finn: I'm turning into you with my confusing statements.

Me: We're going to do a Greek God project in Language Arts. I got Artemis!

Finn: I'm not in that class.

Me: Loser.

**Read and Review? REALLY FAST! Like Nascar fast. I have to clean my room, post this, and take a shower in thirty minutes! Can you beat me? MUAHAHAHA! Probably. Shut up.**


	20. Chapter 20

Me: TODAY IS THE DAY YOU'VE ALL BEEN WAITING FOR!

Finn: Why are you talking normally, but typing in caps?

Me: BECAUSE I can.

Finn: -rolls eyes-

Me: Don't roll your eyes at me!

Finn: Yeah. Sorry. –rolls eyes-

Me: Your eyes are going to fall out of your skull if you do that. Scientific Fact.

Finn: Yeah, right.

Me: I'm serious.

Finn: You're… serious?

Me: As a heart attack.

Finn: -stares-

Chapter 20

_Kat POV_

Despite common belief, Finn was screaming like a little girl as he fell off of Kampê. I caught him with Carpet, whom I had borrowed from Aladdin for a short time, and flew off to go capture some more, with the Bracelet.

"There!" Finn exclaimed, pointing to Ursula trying to swim across the grass. I captured her easily.

"Anyone else?"

"Go to the front, everyone will be trying to leave now," Finn suggested. I steered Carpet towards the entrance of the school and found the Wicked Witch of the West, the Red Queen from Alice of Wonderland, and the Ice- Queen-person from Narnia. I captured them all as Finn randomly would shout, "THERE!" and I'd shoot them with my power. Of course, I found out the hard way that the Bracelet had a carrying capacity. It started flashing red and informing me that I couldn't put anything else in there.

"I have to go empty it out," I told Finn.

"What am I supposed to do?" he exclaimed.

"Fly the carpet around. Help those who need to be helped."

"But I don't have a weapon! I couldn't…"

"Listen, nimrod," I snapped at him. "Enough with _oh, I'm too weak_ or _oh, I can't! I'll break a nail _garbage. You find something. A weapon of any sort to get rid of them. We can't have them going to Candice's side, because that means war. Get a stapler or something!" I jumped off Carpet and landed on the roof. I skidded down the sloping tile and leaped to the next roof. I continued hopping my way through the school until Megatron found me. I saw him, but didn't think he would be a threat. He picked me up with his claw-like fingers.

"Okay Megatron. Put me down," I growled at him.

"I have a proposition for you."

"Can this wait? I'm busy," I said.

"DON'T TELL ME YOU'RE TOO BUSY!" he roared at me. I didn't blink.  
>"Look Negatron…"<p>

"Megatron."

"Whatever," I said dismissively. "You are going to put me down, _right now_, before I make you." He laughed.

"You are going to defeat me? I would like to see that," he snorted.

"The pleasure is mine," I said. I twisted my body around in his spindly grasp and pulled out one of his wires attaching his finger to the rest of his arm.

"What are you doing, girl?" he asked. I ignored him, concentrating on pulling out all the wires I could before he realized I had just ridden him of fingers.

"AH!" he exclaimed, stumbling backwards, creating an earthquake, as he let me go. I plummeted to the grass below, and before I landed, a creature leaped underneath me, catching me with its back.

"OOF!" I grunted as I slammed into its spine.

"Ya!" the rider said.

"Legolas?"

"I'm a natural leader, Master Kat," he called to me as he rode the creature back to Megatron's fumbling form. "I would never sit out a battle."

"We have to empty out the Bracelet!" I told him, crawling up behind him.

"To the prisons?"

"Prisons," I nodded.

"Ya!" he exclaimed, whipping the reins on the horse I was riding as it zoomed past all the classrooms so we reached the prison in no time. I ran inside, releasing all of the captured evils into prison cells that George the Redcoat was now guarding.

"Thanks!" I called over my shoulder, setting all captured evils from the Bracelet to be put into a cell. I ran out and hopped on Legolas' horse. We galloped through the halls.

"Floor it!" I said.

"On it," Legolas replied, whispering something into the horse's ear. It spread magnificent, feathered wings and took off, dodging around a garbage can before reaching an opening to the sky.

"Take the reins!" Legolas commanded. I did so as he took 'shotgun' and aimed his bow and arrow at Megatron.

"Shoot for the eyes!" I called. He nodded and released the arrow. It pierced Megatron's left eye.

"ROOOOOAARR!" Megatron said in response. I soared closer, but lingering out of Megatron's reach. He swiped around blindly, testing my Pegasus-control abilities. I swerved just in time to avoid being hit by his right arm.

"Whoa!" Legolas exclaimed, almost being thrown off the Pegasus.

"Sorry!" I replied, regaining control.

"Get me close to his other eye!"

"Trying!" I yelled over the sudden crack of thunder and rain poured.

"My hair…" I mumbled.

"The eye!"

"I'm going!"

"The OTHER eye!"

"Working on it!" I shot back.

"HIS ARM!" Legolas shouted as Megatron's arm swiped down, hitting a particular rider in the head, and sending them tumbling towards the now sodden earth and knocking her out.

_Finn POV_

Here you go: magic carpet and you can go get a stapler to fight these monsters with guns and swords and such. Now go fight a legion of monsters. I'll be back. That was kind of what Kat told me before leaping over the roof. I growled to myself and floated closer to the ground.

"Okay, where do you find a good weapon?" I asked Carpet. He shrugged and I scowled. I saw the pine tree planted in between buildings and went towards it, ripping off a solid branch to stab.

"Good enough," I said to myself, since Carpet couldn't exactly talk back. I shot towards a couple of monsters trying to eat a picnic table.

"DIE!" I shouted as I stabbed them all while flying past. I heard robotic noises, turned and saw Megatron swiping around blindly and a Pegasus swarming around it.

"Die boy!" I turned back around just in time to get clothes-lined by Phobos and Deimos on flying war chariots. How was I going to fight gods when all I had was a tree branch. They swerved around to face me before charging again.

"I know what you fear!" Phobos laughed maniacally, throwing sharp stones that cut through me. Then, he showed me the vision.

_I was staring off into space. It was a hospital, by the smells and looks of the people waiting around me. Someone stepped out of the door and said,_

"_Whitman?" Without thinking, I stood up and followed him. Instead of there being a regular hospital room, there were coffins lined up on the floor. They all contained my friends: Maybeck, Charlene, Amanda, Jez, Philby, Willa, and Kat was in the final one. I stared in horror at what I was seeing. Kat's eyes opened and looked at me. She was dead, and I was imagining that, but it was creepy all the same. _

"_Why didn't you save me?" she asked sadly. "Why didn't you save us?"_

"_I…" I stammered._

"_That's what I thought," she muttered, closing her eyes and dying again. _

When I woke myself up, out of the vision, Deimos knocked me over and I fell off Carpet and landed on the ground a few feet below. They both raised their spears and charged at me. Inches away from my throat, a conch horn sounded. Phobos and Deimos stopped, sneered at me, then flew away. I laid on the ground, gasping for breath as rain, that I just noticed, pricked at my skin. Carpet hovered, making sure I was okay. I had a bunch of scratches, but nothing serious. I stood up and got on Carpet again. As I did so, I saw Legolas flying towards me.

"Hi Legolas," I said.

"It's Kat!" he exclaimed. Was she dead? Like in my vision? Oh no… "Follow me!" He turned his Pegasus around and flew towards the area where Megatron once stood. She was lying on the grass as rain fell around us. A few Apollo medics and even Apollo himself kneeled around her. As I approached, I saw her breathing.

"What happened?"

"She's unconscious," Apollo said.

"Megatron hit her," Legolas said bitterly. I jumped off of Carpet and went to get a closer look. Her eyes fluttered as she woke up. Apollo smiled.

"She's up," he said cheerfully. She gave him a look.

"Who are you?" she asked.

Me: DUN DUN DUNNNNNN….

Finn: A cliffhanger? Really?

Me: And you'd care if I died!

Finn: I'd care if anyone died.

Me: Even my phone.

Finn: No, because it can be resurrected.

Me: Hmm…. Point taken.

**Read and Review? I'm a hero! Who has Orlando Bloom on her side. MUHAHA? Jealous? I think so!**


	21. Chapter 21

Me: CLIFFHANGER!

Finn: I remember what happened.

Me: If you don't, go read the last chapter! QUICK!

-'Stayin' Alive' plays-

Finn: Everyone knows that song, but not who it's by.

Me: WHO IS IT BY EVERYONE?

Finn: I know! It's the Be…

Me: SHH! Chapter-interruption-to-interrupt-Finn-from-blabbing!

Finn: What?

Chapter 21

_Kat POV_

I thought it was weird waking up to a bunch of people standing around me, like I was important. Then I realized something vastly more important. _WHO THE HECK AM I?_

"She's up!" a tan guy said cheerfully, blinding me with his white smile. I sat up.

"Who are you?" I asked. Everyone's faces fell. Someone muttered that sounded distinctly like a cuss word. "Where am I?"

"Uh… Kat? You're joking right?" I turned towards the voice. He was pretty decent, but he had a few leaves in his hair and scratches all over his face.

"Kat? Is that me?" I asked. I stood up and faced him. "And who are you? Who are ALL of you?" I was trembling now, not because of the rain.

"I'm Finn," Leaf Guy said softly.

"Apollo, god of… a lot of stuff," Smiling-Tan-Guy said.

"Legolas," a cute guy with pointy ears said. The others introduced themselves before vanishing into thin air.

"Is that normal?" I asked, waving my hand around where they were.

"She doesn't remember!" Finn was muttering. He seemed stressed by the news of my amnesia. Was that the word? Yeah.

"She'll be back soon, I promise, Finn. It'd be best to show her the office. Maybe she'll remember…?" Apollo whispered.

"I can hear you. You know that, right?" Apollo glanced at me for a moment before vanishing.

"Why do you all just vanish when you want to? Can I?" I tried. I squinted my eyes and pulled with all my might. I opened up one eye to see I was in the same grass area I was before. "Waste," I muttered.

"Come on, Kat. Let's show you your office," Legolas said. I followed him and then looked at Finn who was standing sadly in the field.

"Are you coming?" I called. He looked up and ran after us.

"Do you really not remember anything?" I shook my head in response.

"What is this place?" I asked, looking at an injured… was that a mermaid? I squinted to look. Sure enough, a mermaid was sitting on a rock soaked in water as one of the girls who introduced themselves when I awoke tended to her fin.

"Ariel gets in a lot of trouble when Ursula escapes," Finn said wistfully.

"Where are we?"

"Character Academy. Your school."

"I go here?"

"No, you're the principal," he corrected.

"Oh." I looked down. "Aren't I a little young to be principal of a gigantic school?"

"Yes. Yes you are," Finn replied. I gave him a weird look before we went inside a rounded building. There was another elf sitting at the front desk, typing away at his computer.

"Good evening, Miss. Kat. Sorry I showed up so early. You begged me to stay, but I refuse to miss a battle that influences the future of the school," he said apologetically. I nodded vaguely and wandered around. I turned into one room that was particularly bigger than the rest. There was a mahogany desk with notepads, computers, a phone, paper scattered everywhere, and a fluffy chair on wheels. I jumped on it and spun around.

"Whee!" I squealed, laughing as I came to a stop and spun again.

"That's your desk." I stopped spinning and looked up. The elf from the front desk stood there, watching me. He looked like he had just planned a funeral.

"Why are you sad?" I asked.

"Because, Miss. Kat, you are not your full self."

"Hey, don't be sad about that. I'll be fine," I reassured him. Had I made an impact on him so massive, it looked like his best friend died? I walked out and saw the rest of the staff looking at me like they were planning their own funerals. What was I doing? How could I principal of a school that I didn't even know existed? I looked at them all, probably terror in my eyes, and ran out the door. I didn't stop crying until I reached the place where I awoke. I needed my memories back. I wanted my memories back. Whoever took them better give them back, right now.

_Finn POV_

She was my kidnapper. She abused me sometimes. She could even be a bit irritating. But she was my friend all the same. And the fact that Kat would run out crying made me fear for my life. Whenever something bad happened, Kat would slap someone, tell them that strange quote from High School Musical: "What team? WILDCATS! Get yo' head in the game!" and threaten to bring them all in here for a concert. That usual cheered us up. Whenever we had to fight someone, a colossal army that could squash us to bits, she would show us the battle plan, and the second she spoke, we felt the spirited hope we would win, and we would. Kat made sure that we would. I decided that this was fate for me, for all of us. I would whip out a brilliant plan and we would win. I just needed to get everyone to 'smell the coffee', as they say.

"Listen up," I said. I didn't need to speak loudly, you could hear a pin drop at this rate. I cleared my throat. "Kat's loss was horrifying. Devastating, even. But look at us! Moping around like a bunch of… Melmans!" Melman the giraffe looked down dejectedly. "Not only are we mourning the loss of Kat's memory, we have a battle to win. One that might affect the future of this school. Candice has freed her army and was preparing to fight as we stand around. Kat is our strength. But she is also our weakness. Kat can fight and kill and capture every monster in sight, but we rely on her too much to protect us. We need to take care of ourselves. The Fates have intended this to happen, so we can go out there, and show that Kat doesn't always have to be around for us to win. What would Kat say right now? Huh?" I acted like a knew what I was talking about, which in truth, I did.

"She would threaten to make us listen to High School Musical," Silvia mumbled.

"That's right. She would make us listen to High School Musical. What else?"

"What team…" George the Redcoat mumbled.

"Wildcats," everyone whispered in response.

"I can't hear you," I said loudly. Spongebob, don't ask how he got in here, looked up.

"What team?" George repeated.

"Wildcats!" everyone chorused.

"GET YO' HEAD IN THE GAME!" everyone yelled.

"So now, instead of mourning for Kat, what are we going to do?"

"Play a basketball game?" Melvin the Purple Bunny Rabbit asked. Silvia smacked him.

"Battle plan!" Legolas exclaimed.

"Round up the troops!" George added.

"Play basketball!" Melvin yelled. Silvia smacked him again.

"Prepare weapons!" she said.

"Tear the enemy apart!" Delaney growled from the back.

"Avada Kedavra them!" Harry Potter chimed in.

"Turn them to stone!" Athena said.

"Choke them with grapes!" Dionysus suggested.

"Break their eardrums!" Apollo joined in.

"Strike them with lightning bolts!"

"Suffocate them with designer scarves!"

"Shoot them through the skull or impale them!" Ares completed. Everyone cheered and poured out through the halls to go accomplish something. I had done it. I had rallied together a bunch of insane 'generals', I guess. I was so proud of myself, I didn't notice the stapler knocked on the floor. I tripped over it and fell flat on my face.

Me: Clumsy Finn…

Finn: Hidden quotes?

Me: High School Musical was a given…

Finn: Oh! I know! Find the Phineas & Ferb quote and the Madagascar quote!

Me: You have a lot to do. I suggest you get on it.

Finn: Who sings 'Stayin' Alive'?

Me: Find the Phineas & Ferb quote…

Finn: And the Madagascar quote!

**Read and Review? Such a sappy chapter. Like I would ever cry. Well, this is my fragile-I-lost-my-memory-wah self, so I wouldn't be surprised. New Hunger Games trailer! I'm actually disappointed. I thought it would be new footage, with Gale and Peeta in it, but noo… you've probably seen all the stuff in it in the teaser or Trailer Numero Uno. Oh well, my opinion. Go see it and see if I'm right. I am, aren't I?**


	22. Chapter 22

Me: Hey GURL!

Finn: … Please don't say that again.

Me: Oh, I won't.

Finn: Do you want to tell them about your dentist appointment? –snickers-

Me: SHUT UP! –whacks with celery- Not really.

Finn: I will!

Me: No you won't! –tases-

Finn: Hah! I'm wearing a special vest and so I can't get tased!

Me: What about tickled?

Finn: What?

Me: -attacks-

Chapter 22

_Sad Kat's POV_

I woke up in a cloth tent, filled with a few people milling around. There was a huge wooden table in the middle and couple of battle-ready people surrounding. Most were wearing armor, some had guns, and others had swords. The one called Legolas had a bow and arrow.

"Force them around the sides of the school and then we can attack from there," Finn said, standing in the middle of the crowd and tracing the motions with a dagger. I sat up and peered over to see what they were looking at. It was a map of a school.

"I have King Leonidas covering the front with his Spartans, Kat's ex-husband with all Hunger Games tributes over here…" he trailed off once he saw me.

"Hey, uh, Kat!"

"Uh, hi Finn." He looked surprised.

"Do you remember anything?" I shook my head.

"You introduced yourself yesterday." He nodded.

"We're just going over battle plans."

"Question," a man said, raising his hand. "Where are we?"

"You all happen to be on this side. The Lord of the Rings army is in the back here. Demigods and gods are taking care of this point here. Who wants to be assigned to protect Kat?" he asked. A few looked around, but no one volunteered.

"Thanks," I grumbled.

"I don't think it's because they don't like you. They love you. Literally. It's just you're who Candice wants to kill."

"I would," the man who asked the question earlier said, looking at me expectantly.

"You command an army, you can't leave your post," a vampire girl said. He nodded and looked back at the table.

"I will," Taffy said. I glanced at him. He straightened up and I noticed he was carrying a bow and arrow as well. Finn nodded.

"Taffy, you are the protection detail to Kat. Keep her safe until the battle is over. Okay?" Finn announced. Everyone nodded. They all shifted away from the table, but Taffy lingered near the exit, guarding me.

"Are you always a military leader?"

"No, not really," Finn chuckled.

"It seems like it."

"Well, it's usually you. You'd probably have a better plan. I don't know which army is the strongest or not, so I'm just throwing people out there."

"What I would do," I said, leaning over the table. I grasped for some memory of battle, anything at all that could be used right now. For some reason I kept thinking of Surge, this strange person who was in my memory.

"Surge forward?" I tried. Maybe it made sense military-wise, but Finn gave me a strange look.

"A what?"

"Don't take the enemy around the sides. They could surround the whole building and we'd all be in for it. Keep them to the front. Have some people in the sky, knocking the bigger ones down from the sky." I took a pencil and began scribbling something that would probably make sense when my hand was finished.

"Um…?"

"Bring all armies to the front, lined up, and neat an orderly. All this way," I drew a long line from the front of the school. "Really long so that no one gets around it."

"Okay…"

"Have an army in the sky as well. I'm certain there are a few flying enemies, right?" I asked. Finn nodded.

"I'll be over here, in the middle of the yard with Taffy." Finn nodded.

"How do you know that?" he asked. I shrugged.

"I don't. My hand does." And I walked out of the tent. I ran straight into the man who volunteered to protect me.

"Master Kat," he said, bowing.

"Do you always do that?"

"Yes."

"Oh. Um. Okay."

"Do you know who I am?" he asked. I shook my head.

"Theseus."

"Oh. Nice to, uh, see you again, Theseus." He looked at me sadly before walking away. I hated how everyone treated me differently because I 'wasn't all there'. Taffy hovered around me the rest of the day, making sure no one came near me. I was that important.

"When is this battle going to happen?" I asked Taffy before bed.

"I do not know. But I guess it will come tomorrow." I shook my head, worried about how these people were all going to live if the war came tomorrow.

_Finn POV_

"She's coming back!" someone hissed in the vague light. The leaders of the individual armies were in the bunker room underneath the water fountain. Theseus, King Leonidas, Percy Jackson, all the gods, Legolas, Dumbledore, Jason Grace, Katniss, and myself were all crowded into the room. Loud whispers filled the room at my sudden announcement.

"Yes! She's coming back at some point!"

"Mentally," Apollo said.

"Yeah, mentally."

"What makes you think that Kat's recovering?" Percy asked.

"She drew out this battle plan after you all left." I spread out the map that she had scribbled on and tried to explain it the best I could.

"That is something she would come up with," Katniss agreed. Everyone nodded. I assigned everyone to their particular area.

"Camp Half-Blood will be in the sky," Percy volunteered.

"I think Camp Jupiter should. We probably have better fighters and archers," Jason pointed out.

"Better fighters," I corrected. "Which is why I need you on the ground. Out of the question."  
>"The archers should be in the sky," Legolas argued.<p>

"I'm obviously a better archer!" Katniss exclaimed. Everyone started arguing at once.

"STOP IT!" I yelled, but no one heard me.

"We have magic!" Dumbledore yelled.

"We are gods!" Zeus roared.

"SILENCE!" Theseus yelled. Everyone shut up.

"I don't care if you are better archers or not. I don't care if you have magic or you're a god. There's a special reason why your army is in a specific place, and I want Camp Half-Blood in the dang sky!" I said forcefully. Everyone grumbled but no one voiced their opinion.

"Thank you," I said tiredly. "Class dismissed."

It was morning again before I received any more news. Frank Zhang had been scouting the school with Hazel and Ares. He returned that morning.

"Finn! The enemy has been spotted!" he exclaimed. "They're going to be here in a few hours!"

"Go tell everyone! Practice for battle NOW." He ran off to go tell everyone. Taffy came in, carrying a sleeping Kat.

"Uh?"

"She is recovering."

"She is?"

"Last night, she woke up in the middle of the night and asked me, 'Taffy what're you doing here? You know I like being alone', and I said 'yes, but I don't know if you've changed your mind', and she said, 'please. How long have we known each other? Forever.' then she fell back asleep and won't wake up," Taffy explained. I jumped up to help set her on the cot in the tent. She woke up as we were setting her down.

"Uh?"

"Kat!"

"Hi? Why am I in a cot? I should be back in my tent where Taffy's guar… oh. Nevermind. We're all here. Is the battle thing starting today?"

"Do you remember me? What's your favorite color?"

"Uh… blue maybe? I think purple. Purple is a pretty color, now that I think about it." I sighed. Taffy looked dejected.

"Not purple then? Orange maybe? Oh, I know! Pink! No? Oh, okay, um…"

Me: Shame I don't remember my favorite color.

Finn: Exactly. The color is green.

Me: GREEN IS AWESOME. –ahem-

Finn: Over reaction.

Me: My ex-husband is going into battle? He better come back alive!

Finn: You control what happens.

Me: -gasp- That's right!

Finn: You forgot about your powers?

Me: Uh, no. Effect dear. Overly dramatic.

**I have special eyes.**

**Look. Look with your special eyes.**

**My brand!**

Finn: Um?

Me: It's from the 1-800 Contacts commercial! Does anyone remember that commercial?

Finn: Doubt it.

Me: THINK!

**Read and Review? You've read. Now you review. Or you read the reviews. Whatever you prefer. Does anyone really remember that commercial? Or just me? Probably not just me. Shut up, Finn. Or should I say… LAWRENCE? Ha, shuts him up every time. You never thought someone could hate their name that much. Have an enthusiastic Character Academy Monday! Alfred the Potato says hi. And for those who care: someone very special that you've most likely forgotten is coming back soon. To a Fanfiction . net near you.**


	23. Chapter 23

Me: Let's go abolish Fanfiction boredness!

Finn: How, may I ask?

Me: By posting Character Academy of course!

Finn: Silly me…

Me: The battle begins… Huh? I say nothing more.

Finn: Stop typing up the final chapter of KKPJ and type this.

Me: But I'm-

Finn: NOW.

Me: -growls-

Chapter 23

_Kat POV_

"Hup two! Move your feet princesses!" someone screamed outside. I put down my book and poked my head outside. An army of fifty soldiers with spears and shields were fighting against each other as a practice drill. I looked around and saw a bunch of other armies around. I almost didn't recognize the place where we were. A field of tents was set off to one side and a bunch of other special places were off to the left. Everyone trained in the middle. The schoolyard where we were all stationed was big enough to hold more armies. Someone grabbed my arm and I jumped.

"It's just me," Taffy said.

"Oh, hi Taffy," I replied. "Don't sneak up on me like that."

"I wasn't… oh never mind. I have to bring you to training, in case I get hurt or am unable to assist you."

"I think we'll be fine," I said.

"No you will not, Miss. Kat. The enemy wants to kill you, and I cannot let that occur. Now come along," he said. He dragged me through the arena and I was letting him, since I was wondering why they would want to kill me, of all people. I had seen myself in the mirror lately, and I don't look too threatening. Taffy handed me a sword and shield.

"Now fight me," he said.

"I'm supposed to… what, stab you or something?" I asked, raising an eyebrow.

"You're supposed to, yes. But not really. I'm on your side, no reason to stab me." I nodded and waited.

"Are you going to move, or what?" I asked.

"I am waiting for you," he replied. I lunged towards him, sword poised for stabbing, but he sidestepped easily. I fell into the dirt and he drew his own sword. When I got up, he had the sword at my neck.

"Try again," he said lightly. I frowned and picked up my sword. I left the shield there, since I had a feeling I wasn't going to need it. I lunged again, but aimed for the spot where he would sidestep. He blocked my sword, twisted it out of my hands and left me weaponless. I growled, determined to get it right. A small crowd gathered nearby. I picked up my sword and attacked again. I dodged his block and used my boot to kick. Instead of falling to the ground in a heap, he somersaulted backwards and was instantly on his feet. I lunged, he rolled underneath me, and whacked me on the back with the hilt of his sword. The crowd snickered. Each time I failed, or fell into the dirt, temporarily defeated, they would laugh louder. I finally got up, grunting, "Again," for the ninth time and stood opposite him. I looked at my sword and threw it on the ground. The crowd laughed. Taffy gave me a look, but I nodded. I lunged at him, he sidestepped, but I shot out my foot to trip him. He jumped up, landed on my ankle, pinning me down. He aimed the sword at my throat, but I was ready. I used my other leg to weaken his right leg, that was pinning down my ankle, by kicking him just behind the knee. Something that someone or other had taught me. He stumbled and recovered quickly, but it was all I needed to escape and pick up the shield. He attacked me, and I blocked his jabs at me. My sword was not too far away, and if I could get to it, I could attack better, not be on defense the whole time. I whammed him in the gut and ran to my weapon. Taffy was on me in seconds, sword raised for stabbing. I dove to the ground, grabbing the hilt of the sword and rolling out of target zone. I tripped him and as he was falling, I grabbed his sword as well. I aimed his sword at his throat. The crowd was silent. I handed Taffy back his sword and looked to the crowd.

"Shouldn't you have somewhere to be?" I asked. They all scurried off. Taffy got up, smiling.

"I can protect myself or whatever now?" I asked eagerly.

"The basics. But I have to prepare for battle myself, and you are coming with me, because I am not to let you out of my sight."

An hour or so flew by with me sitting in a chair, reading while Taffy taught some swordplay to Legolas' army. I looked at what they were doing before sighing and going back to my book. For the umpteenth time. A loud trumpet blared and Taffy was by my side in seconds.

"The enemy has been spotted over the hill. We are preparing for battle," he informed me.

"I should be out there, helping them with fighting."

"You are in no form to be pummeling the enemy."

"I beat you!"  
>"That was basic movements. If I taught you everything I knew about swordplay and tricks, it would take over three years."<p>

"So… what you taught me…"

"Is what everyone must know of swordplay. I wish I had more time-" he started and through the window I saw the first band of enemies. It must've been the size of Leonidas' army, which was the second largest one we had. The Greeks were in the air, shooting arrows from above, disintegrating monster after monster. One slammed into the door and I shrieked. Taffy quickly took care of it. The army slowly stopped advancing, and it seemed like we were winning, when the next wave came. I saw my friends or people I had seen training fall to the ground, never to get up.

"I have to help!" I exclaimed as Taffy slashed off the head of a telkhine.

"Stay here," Taffy ordered, continuing to slash through anyone who got near the hut I was huddled in. I watched as he contributed to the army, and then I saw the smoke. It was wafting through the room and I followed it quickly, afraid the enemy was burning down the hut. I saw a small box, with a tiny, clear, sheet of glass on top.

"Finger identification, please," a mechanical voice said. I pressed my thumb onto it. Was Taffy going to kill me? Yes.

"Welcome Kat," it said. The box opened and smoke poured out. A charm bracelet rested inside, perfectly dusted and polished. I picked it up and rolled it around in my hand. The last thing I remembered before falling to the floor in an unconscious heap was me attaching the bracelet to my hand.

_Finn POV_

"Charge!" I yelled, hurling a dagger into an orc's throat. I saw Camp Jupiter efficiently holding their side of the school. The Hunger Games army wasn't doing so well. I was currently with them, trying to fend off the invaders. Camp Half-Blood was doing an awesome job keeping them out of the sky. I hadn't seen anything of theirs make it over the roof yet. Percy and a couple of others would occasionally swoop down and lay some waste before climbing back up to the sky on their pegasi. Someone whacked me in the back and I stumbled out of the way. The blade whisked by my ear and I breathed a short sigh of relief. The evil demigod hissed in anger and charged again. I blocked with my short dagger, but knew I couldn't hold him off for long. No one was jumping in to help me, and it didn't look like anyone was even looking this way. He whipped out a taser-like thing and it zapped my right hand, making me drop my knife. Now I was weaponless and paralyzed Way to go, Finn. He brought his sword down over me, but the blade never touched me. I had closed my eyes, preferring not to look, and when I opened them, he wasn't there. I saw a golden orb floating before popping into the air. I looked around and saw an orc exploding and a Venus girl screaming. The most glorious sight of all was the attackers about to overwhelm the Hunger Games army being slowly but steadily disappearing. Kat was in the midst of it, shooting them all with The Bracelet. My first thought was, _Taffy was supposed to contain her! How did she find The Bracelet anyway? Does this mean-_

"Don't just stand there, dead-brain! Get a weapon! Fight or something!" Kat yelled at me, hitting a telkhine over the head with a wooden board at the same time. Yep, Kat was back. I heard battle cries as Theseus' army charged in, driving the majority of the enemies back. What was once determination and rage was now fear and uncertainty among their faces. I picked up my knife and slit the throat of the Wicked Witch of The East. She screamed, and Kat zapped her up. The area of fighting was slowly increasing in size as we pushed Candice's army back. Kat patted me on the shoulder, and I turned to say something, but Candice was there, aiming a sword at my throat.

"Now now, come with me, and you won't get hurt. Deal?" she said. I couldn't really fight against a cucumber, ahem, zucchini, now could I? that was an awkward sentence. Anyway, I dropped my knife and she pushed me away from the school. She shoved me into a pumpkin carriage and locked it. I immediately searched for a way out, and my DHI light powers weren't working. I couldn't even see what was happening, as there were no windows. I remembered vaguely something that Kat said. Something about 'you know how I love to fly' or something. Could I fly? Is that it? I closed my eyes and concentrated.

"I can fly," I mumbled. "I can fly!" I burst out, jumping into the air. Unfortunately for me, it didn't work, and now I have a bruise on my head.

"Did someone say 'fly'?" a voice said. I looked around and saw a small ravioli in the corner.

"Mr. Ravioli?" I asked, surprised.

"Hi Finn! I followed you here! It seems you need some help, and I have just the right thing!" he turned around to do something, and I was wondering how he followed me, how he got in here, and how he got out from the hotel room I left him in. He turned around and a small blue fairy melted out of the walls.

"You wish to fly?"

"Temporarily," I said quickly.

"Of course!" the fairy giggled. She tapped me on the head and a gold dust showered around me. I suddenly rose up from where I was sitting.

"Thanks, but how can I get out?" I asked. The carriage door opened. The fairy laughed and Mr. Ravioli was squeaking something.

"Oh. Uh, thank you, again," I said.

"I have something else!" Mr. Ravioli screamed.

"What?" I sighed.

"This is a vaccine that will paralyze Candice for twenty minutes! Use it!" I picked up the small glowing liquid in an injection needle.

"Thanks, bye!" I said, turning to fly out.

"Take me with you!" he wailed. I sighed, felt bad for him. He had helped me in the past, so I slipped him into my pockets.

"WHEE!" he shrieked as I flew out of the carriage.

And so I flew off into the battle with fictional characters, flying, with a screaming ravioli in my pocket and a vaccine that would paralyze a shape-shifting zucchini. Not the weirdest thing I've done.

Me: And everything falls into place.

Finn: How nice…

Me: Not entirely… more to come, much more adventures to come!

Finn: Oh… uh…. –sarcasm- Yay…

Me: It gets much weirder Finn. MUCH weirder.

Finn: I just think you're trying to scare me.

Me: Am I, Finn? Am I really?

Finn: …

**Read and Review? I'm currently typing up the sneak peeks, trailers, or whatever to the sequel to KKPJ. It will be coming out shortly, so have no fear! I just finished the last chapter for this Friday… -sadness-… on the brighter side of the rainbow, I'm putting up a poll! Yay! Vote now, because it ends on Friday!**


	24. Chapter 24

Me: HI HI!

Finn: Um.

Me: I like this chapter. Partly because of my illegal 2nd husband showing up, and because of the end of Finn's POV. DON'T SKIP THE REST. Heh…

Finn: … I don't like that one.

Me: I DO! On with the chapter!

Chapter 24

_Kat POV_

Finn vanished shortly after I saved him, which irritated me, but I kept shooting people with my magical Bracelet. Was my memory back? Yes. Did I like it? No. Taffy was nowhere to be found and if he saw me before I found him, I don't think he'd be thrilled. I was aiming the Bracelet at an orc, but someone ran by, knocking it out of my hand and into the dirt. I crawled around, looking for it, and avoiding stampeding people. Someone from behind me grabbed my shirt collar and yanked me to my feet.

"Let me go!"

"You shouldn't be here!" Theseus said.

"You don't underst-"

"Perseus!"

"No! No, no, no. Theseus, I'm back! My mem- GAH," I stuttered but was swept away by a pegasus.

"Percy! Put me down. RIGHT NOW," I demanded.

"I can't, we have to go find Taffy," he said, helping me onto the horse.

"I'm sorry!" I yelled before pushing him off of Blackjack. Blackjack dove down, catching Percy's shirt with his teeth.

"Lower him to the ground, you can come back to him later," I commanded, steering Blackjack away after we dropped a very angry Percy on the ground. I soared to the area where I had dropped the Bracelet. I saw it gleaming in the soil below. I went to go dive Blackjack to get it, but Percy's buddies didn't like me being on his pegasus, so they all flew towards me.

"Change of plans. Have fun!" I said, jumping off of Blackjack and landing on someone's back.

"AGH!" they grunted before falling to the ground.

"Sorry!" I said, spotting the Bracelet a foot away. I dove, and I got it. I stood up and went to go officially apologize to the person I bodyslammed into the dirt, but only found Finn looking annoyed.

"Stop leaving," I grumbled, clasping the Bracelet around my wrist.

"I was kidnapped! Candice put me in the pumpkin carriage from Cinderella! Oh, and I picked up a stray," he reached into his pocket and pulled out Mr. Ravioli.

"Mr. Ravioli?" I asked, making sure that he wasn't his cousin or something. They all look the same.

"Hi!" he squeaked enthusiastically.

"He was in the carriage with you?"

"Yeah. And he gave me this," Finn also showed me a glowing, blue vaccine.

"Why in the world would… Mr. Ravioli, where did you get this?" I asked the tiny pasta, taking it from Finn.

"Well of course I got it from the clinic!"

"The clinic had this?" I asked.

"That's what I said! As I was saying, Grandpa Ravi-"

"No time!" I interrupted, putting the vaccine in my pocket. "We have to go find the Fairy Godmother!"

"The who?" Finn asked, shoving his way behind me. A band with long hair and The Who shirts looked up from beating a telkhine with their various instruments. I shook my head and they continued to beat the seal-like creature with a Gibson Les-Paul. Or something like that.

"Where's Mr. Ravioli?" I asked Finn, ignoring his question.

"Um."

"Go get him!" I said. Finn turned, scooped up the out-of-breath ravioli and put it in his pocket. When he came back to me, I answered his question.

"The Fairy Godmother," I repeated. Finn gave me a blank look.

"From Cinderella. The fairy who turned all the mice into horse."

"OH! Why her?" I rolled my eyes.

"Well, who else do you know that makes pumpkin carriages? That can be turned into prisons?"  
>"What about the vaccine?"<p>

"You know how she was involved in all of that stuff… the 'drug' dealing. The magical potions. Accomplice for Aphrodite most of the time," I was saying before I was so rudely interrupted by my illegal 2nd husband.

"What are you doing? I gave you to Perseus," he said.

"I'm fine! I have my memory back. I escaped Percy anyway, so if you could let me go please so I can save the school?"

"Don't get hurt," Theseus said, putting me down.

"Promise," I called, continuing running to the Fairy Godmother on the side of Candice's army.

"Who was that?"

"Theseus. From The Immortals. Awesome movie."

"You never saw it."

"I don't care!" I snapped. "It was Rated R. For violence! I'll find a way… MOVE!" I shoved a soldier out of the way as I burst through Candice's ranks. Finn stumbled after me, ducking underneath a swinging axe. I tossed him a sword that I conjured, and he quickly stabbed the axe-wielder in the stomach.

"I just killed someone," he said, surprised. He halted to stare at the lifeless body on the ground.

"Bad people," I informed him.

"I don't even know how to use this thing."

"Stab. Block. There it is. LET'S GO," I said sternly, dragging my knight in tinfoil armor through the throng of evil, fictional people.

_Finn POV_

FINN WHITMAN IS A MURDERER. The headlines would scream as they showed a picture Finn Whitman, handsome, yet intelligent, to justice for all the people he killed with his sword. Maybe that wasn't exactly accurate, but I was a murderer. Kat didn't seem to notice, or be concerned that I just stabbed one, and I don't think she had time to. We were on a quest to find the Fairy Godmother, who I guess was bad. Like Aslan, I figured that she 'converted' from good to evil.

"How will we know when we see her?"

"Well, I hope by what she's wearing," Kat replied.

"A military uniform? Guns? Swords?" I asked. Then we saw her. She was dressed in her sparkly blue dress and she looked exactly like she did in the stories and the movie.

"BIPPITY BOPPITY BOO!" she yelled, zapping a Hunger Games tribute. He fell to the ground and didn't get up.

"The forbidden spell," Kat muttered. "Steer clear if she says that to you."  
>"Bippity Bo-" I started. Kat slapped me and interrupted my sentence.<p>

"Dude," I protested.

"Don't say it! It's more powerful than you think. Now shut up and help me kill her."  
>"She'll just go to the Inner Sanctum," I pointed out.<p>

"She'll die eventually. ANYWAY," she said loudly and stepped out in the fairy's view.

"Hello, my pretty," she cackled.

"That's out of character," I whispered.

"Duh. It's Multiple Character Disorder. She… just shut up and help me!" Kat growled.

"Fine, fine. YO UGLY!" I yelled.

"Bippity Boppity" she began, I ducked. "BOO!" A laser shot out and hit the tree behind me, burning a clean hole. I gulped and turned around. Kat was taking out the vaccine. I was trying to signal that the vaccine was for Candice, not Miss. Witchy without being conspicuous. She almost turned around, but I threw a rock at her.

"Stupid boy!" she growled.

"Come and get me, tub of lard," I teased, hiding behind a tree as she shot her magical spell at me.

"ROAR!" Kat shrieked, stabbing Miss. Witchy with the vaccine.

"That was for Candice," I said.

"Whatever," she rolled her eyes. The Fairy Godmother/ Miss. Witchy was frozen in her spot.

"Well? Zap her," I said. "I didn't distract her for nothing."

"We can't zap her when she's like this. We have to weaken her before."

"How are we supposed to do that? Cut off her legs and arms? I don't think my sword could do that. Maybe some ninjas…" I was babbling before she said, "Shut up," and removed the wand from the fairy's hand.

"That works too."

"Bippity Boppity BOO!" Kat said, pointing at the witch/fairy. It hit her, and like she was covered in glass, a part of it shattered and she was able to move.

"GARR!"

"I don't think she likes us," I pointed out.

"Glad you're so observant," Kat said sarcastically.

"Glad to help," I retorted.

"Expelliarmus!" Kat yelled. The witch fell backwards, as she was reaching for a dagger. She rubbed her hand, now entirely movable.

"Stupefy!" The witch was thrown backwards.

"Capture," she ordered the Bracelet. The witch disappeared in a poof of smoke.

"Isn't she supposed to turn into an orb?"

"Yeah," my kidnapper growled. "She got away."

"We stupidfied her and she got away?"

"Stupefy, Finn. Not stupidfy."  
>"Same thing. I'm not from Hunger Games, am I?"<p>

"No, and neither is stupefy. It's Harry Potter," Kat informed me, trying not to laugh. I made a face and stomped away.

Me: STUPIDFY!

Finn: SHUT UP!

Me: Hunger Games… Finn's stupidfy.

Finn: … -hides in closet-

Me: Finn! Come out of the closet! –laughing hysterically-

Finn: -growling-

Me: You walked into that one! THE CLOSET! Get it? You walked into the closet… HAHHAHAHHAHHHAHAHHAHAHAHA!

Finn: Leave me alone!

**Read and Review or I'll stupidfy you. Did I spell 'expelliarmus' right? One of the few spells I know. STUPEFY! Sorry about last week, I didn't feel like it. I'm so awesome at excuses. See you on the 26th. WAIT! There's a Monday in between today and then! Well, that specific day is my Biology and Spanish Midterm… and I have to study for my Psychology and English exam the next day. And it's Christmas week. The only thing that will be posted that week is KKPJ, Trailer Number 3! ARE YOU EXCITED FOR KKPJMR? I am! January 6th! STUPIDFY!**


	25. Chapter 25

Me: How was your Christmas?

Finn: Ours went decently.

Me: No webcam, so maybe a smidge of Skyping for you.

Finn: -gasp- You didn't know about our Skype?

Me: We got a Skype! Correction: I got a Skype. Finn doesn't make too many appearances. I did talk to MoonXRain.

Finn: Didn't she change her username?

Me: … Ungh. I don't know anymore.

Chapter 25

_Kat POV_

We weaved into the woods and out quickly and back into open battle. Percy Jackson was slashing a few balrogs open and Arianna Fitzpatrick was 'stupidfying' a few Dementors. Finn reached into his pocket and then stared at me.

"I dropped my knife."

"You dropped your knife?" I said. I looked behind us, where the woods loomed. And Finn's knife. I sighed then remembered something that I put in my pocket before I left my small room. I reached into my pocket and pulled it out. Finn gaped at it.

"How did… what?"

"Please, Finn. I own every weapon: fictional and nonfictional." I examined the small, metallic blue, cylindrical figure with an ink tip.

"This is Walt's Pen. I'm really not supposed to be giving it to you now, so when this stupid war is over, you give it back to me. It's only to be given to the 'chosen one'." Link looked up where he was whacking a Deku Baba.

"Not you," Finn said. He frowned and continued stabbing it.

"It electrocutes the enemy, so watch where you aim. Aim and press the button on the hilt. DO NOT USE THIS FOR TOO LONG! You will get attached and then I'll have to break your face. Clear?" I snapped. Finn nodded, now looking like he didn't want it anymore. I handed it to him and he took it reluctantly.

"Okay," I said. "GO KILL PEOPLE! RAHH!" I yelled, charging back into the woods. Finn crashed in after me. I sighed and turned around.

"What're you doing?" I asked.

"Following you…?"

"NO! Go back! I'm going to kill Candice. You go kill her friends." I pointed behind him and he stared at me for a moment. Then he turned and trudged away. I sighed and kept running.

"If I were a zucchini, where would I be?" I grumbled as I jumped over a tree stump. Then I slammed into a moving figure.

"OW!" they yelled.

"What do you want?" I growled. I saw who it was and raised an eyebrow.

"What're you doing out here anyway?" I asked. Leo sighed and raised a wrench.

"I'm looking-" he started.

"Where are you from?"

"Well, Wolfie…"  
>"Ah. Say no more. You're from my Redwolf11 thing. Kaylena and… 'kay. Uh… unpublished fics… that way." I pointed to the left as Leo from Heroes of Olympus ran off in the direction I was pointing.<p>

"Kat." I turned and saw Candice standing across the clearing, opposite the tree stump. She was not in zucchini form, but in Katniss form. I knew it was her because the Bracelet was beeping like crazy. It does that when it senses her.

"Candice."

"Looking for me?"

"Only a bit," I said, creeping closer.

"No weapons. Fair fight. For me. Could you handle it?" she asked.

"Can you? You're just a cucumber with a fancy get-up," I laughed. She dropped her bow and arrow and I dropped my sword.

"Fair fight," I confirmed.

"No interfering?"

"No interfering."

"To the death?" she asked. I winced. To the death was a little much.

"To the death."

_Finn POV_

Being dissed by your kidnapper wasn't fun. And there I was with a weapon that 'I shouldn't get attached to' or she'll 'break my face'. Thanks, Kat. I charged in and pressed the button, aiming at a giant stomping through. A stream of lightning shot out from the tip of the pen and it zapped the giant, who exploded into yellow dust. I coughed and kept running. A few got in my way, but were soon eliminated. It was easy to use, and efficient. Walt's Pen was pretty awesome. How would I earn it? By… doing good deeds? Zap. Can drives? Zap. Nursing homes? Zap. As my thoughts raced, I zapped the enemy.

"FINN!" someone yelled. I turned and someone grabbed the back collar of my shirt and flew me up into the air. When I stopped freaking out, Percy brought me up next to him on Blackjack.

"Kat's in trouble?" I asked.

"I don't know that, but there's something wrong, and Taffy needed you. And I have to hurry. Unless you want us to die." We flew up into the sky where there was a boat pushing through the clouds.

"The Argo 2?" I asked, excitedly.

"No. It's a fly-boat. Ron Weasely likes it. Anyway…" we flew up next to it. Jack Sparrow was steering and yelling at someone for 'stealing his peanuts'. Taffy helped me on, saluted Percy, and Percy went back down to fight.

"Kat's in trouble?" I asked again.

"Is she?" he asked, like he was going to freak out.

"No! Just… just checking… What do you want?"

"This is a fly-boat equipped with celestial bronze cannonballs. We are going to fire it upon the enemy's masses."  
>"Why do you need me? Specifically…"<p>

"Because someone's on here to see you." Taffy pointed to a door that would lead to a cabin. I looked at Taffy unsurely before opening the door. The staircase led down to a looming darkness, like the stairs were being eaten. Shut up, brain. I went down the stairs and felt around for a doorknob. It was the only door down there. I twisted it open and there was a small gold shrine emanating from the room, the only light in the room. A person was kneeling, wearing a white gown and a veil over her head. When I came in she spoke,

"Finnegan Whitman. Enter."

Me: WHO'S THE CREEPY GIRL?

Finn: I don't know.

Me: … Enthusiastic. I'm going to Universal sometime next week and if you have any advice for anti-heights people. My friend wants be to ride Hulk, but that goes…

Finn: Upside down.

Me: Yeah. I like it when I go fast, not upside down. HUGE heights, like dropping sixty feet, isn't fun.

**Read and Review? I mentioned you G-L-I-M-M-E-Ressence. Arianna Fitzpatrick. Yep. **


	26. Chapter 26

Me: Guess who's going to Universal today?

Finn: We are! Kat's first time going.

Me: I have a fear of heights, so there was no real reason to. Roller coasters and such.

Finn: And all her friends are roller coaster maniacs, I think Kat and I will just watch them flip around… ugh.

Me: Agreed. Hey, this is the first Character Academy of the New Year!

Finn: Last year…

Me: NO IT'S NOT. –whacks with celery-

Chapter 26

_Percy POV (OMGWTF)_

I tilted downward, and we shot back toward the field where the battle was taking place. Everyone seemed to be holding up good, but a couple Decepticons were charging their way across, going to overwhelm us. I yelled and the campers on pegasi saw where I was pointing and flew to defeat. Optimist Prime was off somewhere, only showing up when needed. It seemed like we were winning for a moment, but then my heart dropped a few floors when I saw another wave of Cucumber Baddies. The gods were slowly killing Typhon and a few orcs got into the school, dashing around the courtyard and I flew after them.

_Can we get some doughnuts? Man, I'm so hungry…_ Blackjack grumbled as we soared towards the clumsy things.

"Later, we have to kill these things," I said, coming in fast.

_Aren't those blue things we're chasing impenetrable or something?_

I realized Blackjack was right. My sword wouldn't do me much good here, and by the feeling in my gut, I didn't have enough power to summon a wave to wash them away. Then I saw my solution, a red alarm. Not your typical alarm though, remember what school I go to. I halted Blackjack and ran to it. I switched the lever and ran back to my pegasus, desperate to get in the air as fast as possible. The bear-hounds weren't too fond of me. A metal gate swung open and the terrifying creatures leaped out, growling and barking at the same time. They looked like huge grizzly bears, with dog tails, tongue, and a double amount of teeth, one set from dogs, the other from bears. They also had enhanced speed and smell. They tore across the field as they smelled an unfamiliar object. I watched from the roof as they attacked the orcs. They wailed and tried to bat the animals away, but they were relentless. I flew away, not wanting to see what happened next. I looked up and saw a flash of lightning, but something was different about that particular lightning bolt. It wasn't as powerful as Zeus', which led me to believe that Kat had done that. Kat! Where was she? I flew past a burned up Decepticon and went down to the battlefield. As I landed and tried to find someone who might know where Kat was, the bear-hounds escaped the school. The Spartan army led by King Leonidas stepped aside as the bear-hounds pounced on the enemy. That should keep them busy. I saw Gale, Kat's supposed husband, and went to ask him.

"Where's Kat?" I asked him.

"I don't know," he shrugged.

"She's your wife, right?"

"NO! She's not my wife! We're never married."

"Then why is she going around, telling everyone that you are?"

"Well, supposedly we were, but then she 'married' Theseus, so I have no idea anymore," Gale sighed.

"Who's Theseus?" I asked. I knew exactly who he was, but I didn't know what he looked like. Gale pointed to a guy in Greek armor, slashing people left and right. I went up to him and he attacked me.

"No! Stop it! I'm on your team!" I yelled, battling him with Riptide.

"What do you want?" he asked, focusing on someone else instead.

"I want to know where your wife is."

"Wife? I'm not married."

"Kat."

"Kat's not… is… oh. I have no idea where she is, I did see her with Finn and they both went into the forest. Then Finn came out and you swooped him up," he said, stabbing someone in the stomach. I ducked underneath someone's sword swing and I slit his throat.

"Thanks!" I called, running to Blackjack. I went to the exact spot I'd left him, and he wasn't there. I looked up to the sky and saw another Kat lightning bolt, but no dark pegasus. Thanks for nothing.

_Finn POV_

I stepped forward and the door shut behind me. I tried to open it, but it wouldn't open.

"It won't open until I tell it to," the person inside spoke, still kneeling at the altar.

"Um… who are you?" I asked meekly. She stood up and turned towards me. She had wavy blonde hair, but it was hard to tell anything else because the shadows covered her face.

"My name is Rosie, and I am the Oracle of the Delphi."

"Rachel is."  
>"I am the older one," Rosie scoffed. She turned and sat down on the altar, which seemed strange. "Ask and you shall receive."<br>"Why am I here?" I asked, still confused about the Oracle thing.

"I had a dream of you, Lawrence."

"I go by Finn," I muttered.

"Do you want me to tell you what it is?"

"I guess." She raised an eyebrow. "Yes!" I exclaimed. She sighed and cupped her hands around her mouth. She blew into it and released her breath into the air. Suddenly, I saw a picture of me, I was standing over a dead body, not crying, but I was going to. I couldn't see who it was, but it must be someone important. Then I was at a funeral service, the body in a golden coffin and everyone in the school was at the pews and I saw that I was standing in the front, speaking the eulogy. Then the picture vanished.

"That's it?" I asked.

"I only get glimpses in dreams. The prophecy for you is different," Rosie said. She doubled over, like someone punched her and her eyes began to glow green. Green smoke poured into the room and I stood there, terrified. This had only happened once, and that was fake me, in Kingdom Keepers Maximum Ride Crossover.

"_The land of the dead is where you go. Make it through, but no one can know. Five days await. The ocean, the light, the dead one awake. Collect your toll, and accept your fate. The breath of the lost one holds in bate._" Rosie coughed and stood up.

"Thanks…?" I said, unsure how to handle this 'news'.

"The prophecy is happening soon. Very soon. Possibly in the next hour. Nothing you can do to prevent it, but you only have five days to accomplish this mission. Make haste, Lawrence. Make haste," she whispered and disappeared. I stood there for a while, expecting her to come back, but she didn't. I ran out of the room as fast as possible and almost ran into Taffy.

"Someone's in trouble!" I said anxiously.

"Who?"

"I don't know," I said. He stared at me for a moment. Rosie appeared suddenly, in the middle of the deck and I stifled a shriek. No one seemed to see her. She mouthed the words and that's something I'll never forget. I'm not very good at reading lips, so when I tried to, I thought she said 'Map'.

"Map?" I said outloud. She shook her head.

"Who are you talking to?" Taffy asked. Rosie mouthed the word again and this time I understood.

"Kat."

Me: OOH! What's going to happen to me?

Finn: Another cliffhanger? I think you have to finish off the last one.

Me: No I don't! Leave me alone!

Finn: -sigh- Whatever.

**Read and Review? OMG KKPJMR is THIS FRIDAY? Who's psyched? I am! Are you? I would be. This is going to be intense. Three POVs in each chapter, each chapter with a panic-inducing situation. Yup. Made that up right now. See you next MERNDAY! (Monday in gibberish).**


	27. Chapter 27

Me: The epic… battle of the ages.

Finn: Ugh. Please don't.

Me: Between Kat.

Finn: She is.

Me: And zucchini. I WILL SLASH AND HACK HER "HEAD" OFF!

–jumps on Finn's back- -starts spinning around-

Finn: You're. So. Fat. –drops-

Me: You're just overweight.

_Kat POV_

It'd be awfully embarrassing if I told you I was getting beat up by a cucumber. Fortunately, I seemed to be winning. She had nail marks on her "head" and a bite mark in her side. I had a couple of scratches and a bruise on my knee. I had grabbed a tree branch and whacked my knee on accident. I used the tree branch to slam it upside her "head". Cucumbers/zucchinis don't have heads. They're vegetables.

"You'll never beat me," Candice snarled, punching my side.

"Trying to discourage me because you're afraid of losing?" I taunted. She shifted into a human form, and I broke the tree branch over her head, then grabbed her swinging fist and twisted it.

"That's it!" Candice snapped, grabbing a sword that magically appeared. I pulled out my sword that also magically appeared and we fought. I would stab her side, and then block her jab.

"Kat!" a voice said. Finn.

"I told you to leave," I grunted, blocking another jab.

"You need help," he protested, starting towards us.

"Stay back, boy!" Candice snapped at him.

"It's fight thing, between enemies." I slammed into her, pushing her into the ground, her sword grazing my hand on the way down. I threw my sword onto her shoulder and I backed up, breathing heavily.

"ARGH! Let me up, you stupid cheese ball!"

"Stupid. I'm going to kill you," I sighed. I went to go retrieve the Bracelet where I'd thrown it, and put it on. I aimed it at her, preparing to send her to the Inner Sanctum.

"Any last words?" I asked smugly. She smiled.

"I poisoned my sword," she replied. I stared at her for a moment before zapping her up.

"Who knew it would be that easy?" I said to Finn.

"What did she mean by 'I poisoned my sword'?" Finn asked warily.

"Probably thought she stabbed me," I shrugged. "Missed." I raised my arms up and spun in a circle to show him.

"You… your hand!" he exclaimed, pointing at my hand. I looked at it and saw the cut. I cursed loudly.

"Apollo!" I called. He didn't show up. I could feel my legs weakening and the poison coursing through my veins.

"You're not going to die," Finn said shortly before I fell to the ground, too weak to move.

"Ugh. I hate Candice," I muttered.

"You're not going to die," Finn said quickly, sounding like he was reassuring himself more than me.

"Oh gods, what if I die, Finn? I've never… died before. I guess I'll go to the Underworld…"

"You're not going to die," Finn repeated.

"Let it go, Finn. I'm going to die. Right now. Before I go…"

"You're not 'going' anywhere!"

"IF I go… take the Bracelet. You'll need it. Also, Hermione needs a new scarf because a hippogriff tore hers. And… there's so much. I think the list is on my desk. Look there, you'll find it," I said. My eyes shut and I couldn't pull them open.

"Finn…?"

"Don't go anywhere, I'll get help," he said. I couldn't see him, but I heard him as he got up.

"Idiot! I'm dying and you go to get help? You want me to die alone? Literally?" I snapped weakly.

"I'm going to prevent you from dying," he protested. I heard the crunching of leaves for a while until I couldn't hear anything anymore. I lay there, immobile and blind.

"Finn?" I whispered, feeling my systems shutting down. For starters, I couldn't feel my legs. Or my hands for that matter.

"Finn, please come back." No one replied.

"H-help…" I coughed weakly. I remember hearing someone shouting in the distance, "KAT!" before I couldn't hear anything anymore.

_Finn POV_

I knew what was going to happen; I just didn't think it would happen. I stumbled through the woods, trying to find help, anybody. I went through the clearing and found that the war was over, Candice's evil people were gone and everyone was fixing up wounds. I found Arianna Fitzpatrick, Theseus, and Percy standing by, uninjured.

"Kat's in trouble!" I told them breathlessly, pointing to the woods behind me. I knew she was gone, but maybe, just maybe we could save her. Percy glanced at Theseus, and Theseus glanced at Percy, and Arianna was already running to the woods. The two guys ran after her and I followed.

"KAT!" Percy yelled, hoping for a response. We came to the clearing and her body was lying off to the side. I could see the cut in her hand, the one that killed her. They dashed to her. Arianna pressed her ear to Kat's chest and checked her pulse. She glanced up at us and shook her head.

"Oh gods…" Percy whispered and I sat down hard on the tree stump, facing the other way. I knew she was going to die, and I didn't do anything about it. You might be saying, "Run free! She's gone! She kidnapped you, remember?" but I had a job to do. Rosie told me, and I was going to stick by it. I stood up and looked at them.

"We have to go to the Underworld," I told them, then repeated the prophecy.

"The water's obviously me," Percy said.

"Yeah, but do you want to go?"

"Of course. Kat gave me a home away from away from home." I gave him a weird look but shook my head.

"Theseus?" I asked, hopefully.

"I am staying. I will bury her within five days," he replied, not looking up from Kat's lifeless body. I couldn't help but feel sad for him. She practically saved him from the war-like place he used to live and gave him a new life with plenty of friends.

"The dead one awake…" I mumbled.

"I died. A long time ago. But I woke up," Arianna told me. I looked at her.

"That's not what-

"Look, do you want me to come, or not?" I sighed.

"Yeah, let's go," I finally said.

"So… the Underworld?" Percy asked.

"Yep."  
>"Yay."<p>

Me: So… DRAMATIC!

Finn: I personally would've run away. This 'Finn' here would? Not me. At all. ESCAPE.

Me: You couldn't even escape me if I fictionally died.

Finn: And why is that?

Me: Because my students will rescue me, or I'll fail them and they have to take the grade again. AND THEY CAN'T GO ANYWHERE.

Finn: -shakes head- Evil.

**Read and Review? What was your favorite part? –stares at you awkwardly for a while- I liked that part too. And I don't own Arianna Fitzpatrick. Let's see if I get this right… G-L-I-M-M-E-R-ESSENCE. Did I get it? DID I WIN?**


	28. Chapter 28

Me: Happy MLK DAY!

Finn: Yay for African American Rights!

Crowd: -uproarious applause-

Zayn: What am I doing here?

Finn: Who are you?

Me: Er, I don't know! –waves hand-

Zayn: -disappears-

Finn: Who was that?

Me: I DON'T THINK HE'S MY BOYFRIEND, STOP ASKING ME QUESTIONS!

Finn: What? I didn't say anything about him being your boyfriend…

Me: Neither did I…

Finn: Yes you-

Chapter 28

_Arianna POV_

Okay, maybe I lied about the 'dying' thing, but no one had to know, it wasn't like it mattered or anything. I didn't even know where the Underworld was, no matter what it is. Percy did though, he's in my gym class, and he seemed to not like it very much.

"Not to be ridiculous, but what's the Underworld?" I asked him.  
>"Where all people go when they're dead," he answered. We walked back to the school with Finn and headed off to our separate trailer-dorms. I took a backpack filled with potions and magical spells. I brought my wand and put it where I could access it easily, but not in my pocket where I could snap it. I went to wait out by the front of the school. Someone ran into me and didn't apologize.<p>

"Watch where you're going," I snarled. He didn't even look up. He just turned to face me, and I saw he was looking in a glass of water.

"Pretty…" he said dreamily before walking away. I shook my head in confusion.

"Arianna!" Remus exclaimed, running up to me. Muggle hair! I forgot to tell him about the journey.

"Oh, hey Remus," I grimaced.

"What's wrong?" he asked immediately.

"I'm going on a journey with Percy and Finn to the Underworld," I told him.

"What in the name of Voldemort is the Underworld?"

"It's where people go when they die, underground of course."

"And you're going with two guys?" he said, raising an eyebrow. I chuckled and hugged him.

"You know my heart lies with you," I said. "But yes."

"How long will you be gone?"

"Five days, I think," I tried to remember the prophecy. "Yes, five days."

"Arianna!" Finn called from behind me. I turned to look at him.

"In a minute," I replied. I turned back to Remus.

"I-" I started, but Remus shook his head.

"You have to go now," he finished. I nodded. He squished me close to him and kissed me gently.

"Be safe," he said as I walked off.

"I will!" I joined Percy and Finn who were waiting for me.

"So how do we get to the Underworld?" I asked as we set off.

"Find the entrance," Finn said unhelpfully.

"Where's the entrance?"

"Hollywood California," Percy clarified. I thought for a moment before replying.

"So where are we?" Finn thought about that for a moment.

"Fanfiction World. The world above the clouds. We have to find a portal close to California to land in." Of course that sentence didn't make any sense.

"How close are we to a portal near the Underworld?" Percy asked this time. Finn shrugged.

"Maybe five or six." I glanced at Percy.

"Five or six what? Days? Years?"

"Months?" Percy chimed in.

"No," he replied and didn't say anything else.

"Then what?" I asked.

"Miles," he sighed, like we should've known.

"And what time is it?" I asked.

"You ask a lot of questions," Finn glanced at me. I shrugged.

"Habit, I guess. So what time is it?"

"Summertime! It's our vacation!" a bunch of people dressed in summer dresses jumped out of nowhere and began singing and dancing in sync. I stifled a shriek and got out my wand, but before I could use it, Finn lowered my weapon. Percy had his sword out as well, but he lowered it too.

"It's just the High School Musical people. They always do that," he explained.

"What time is it? Summertime! School's out, scream and shout!" they sang.

"When do they stop?" I asked.

"It takes a while, just ignore them and they'll go away."

"Or maybe no sudden movements," Percy suggested. We walked for fifteen minutes, but the High School Musical people followed us.

"GETCHA HEAD IN THE GAME!" they were now screaming annoyingly.

"Please make them shut up before I go deaf," Percy said, covering his ears.

"No! We're doing good, they should leave any moment!" Finn grumbled.

"Everyday! Of our lives! Wanna find you there, wanna hold on tight. Gonna run! While we're young, and keep the faith!"

_Finn POV_

Okay, maybe they weren't going to go away. The 'sun'/ Apollo had gone away and they were still there.

"What team?" Troy Bolton exclaimed.

"WILDCATS!" everyone screamed in my ear.

"GETCHA HEAD IN THE GAME!" they all shouted.

"Unh," I mumbled.

"Shouldn't they have left by now?" Percy asked, swatting away Sharpay.

"Yeah," I admitted. "These must be really persistant."

"I want fabuLOUS that is my simple request, all things fabuLOUS bigger, better and best! I need something inspiring to help me get along! I need a little fabulous, is that so wrong?"

"I wish it was Glee, and not High School Musical," Arianna sighed. At least the Glee people one: had talent, and two: didn't magically know all choreography to a song that was so random.

"I'm going to punch one in the face next time," I growled.

"You are the music in me! NANANANA! NANANANA, NA NA NA, you are the music in MEE!" Sharpay screeched. Before I could yell at them, they suddenly disappeared. I stared around, looking for them, but couldn't find them.

"Thank the gods," Percy exclaimed.

"I don't think they would just leave like that," I said warily. Arianna took out her wand, and Percy unsheathed his sword. I took out Walt's Pen. Oops. I forgot I wasn't supposed to have it too long. Great. I heard snarling coming from the dark parts where no one could see.

"Um, what was that?" Arianna asked quietly. Suddenly, it lunged at us.

"Bear-hound!" I yelled, dodging it.

"What in the name of Voldemort is that?"

"Bear-hounds are a hybrid of bear and dog! They have heightened senses, smell, immune to all diseases, an extra set of teeth, spiky tails, and have impenetrable skin!" Percy yelled to her, slashing at one with his sword, not making a dent in the bear-hound's skin. Suddenly, three more bear-hounds prowled from the shadows.

"I think we ran into a whole colony of them!" Arianna exclaimed. "Stupefy!" she yelled, zapping a bear-hound. It flew backwards but got up and lumbered closer.

"DIE!" I yelled, trying to zap it with my pen. It pinged off and disappeared.

"Avada Kedavra!" Arianna tried, and it flung all the bear-hounds back, and they looked dazed, but stood up growling again.

"RUN!" I shouted and we took off, running over the green grass of Fanfiction World, with four bear-hounds chasing us and wanting to dip us in ketchup. I really didn't like bear-hounds.

Me: HIGH SCHOOL MUSICAL. OH NOOOO….

Finn: I can only imagine how terrifying that must have been.

Me: And bear-hound colonies? Even worse. How dare you keep the pen after I told you not to.

Finn: -shrugs- What can I say? I'm a rebel.

Me: Sure… What's two plus two?

Finn: Um. Four.

Me: NOT A REBEL. A REBEL WOULD SAY, "Who cares about education?"

Finn: Well I care about education.

Me: Not a rebel.

Finn: Can't help it if I'm going to be successful and smart.

Me: I didn't say rebels were intelligent.

**Read and Review before High School Musical jumps up and down on your bed tonight and sings "I Don't Dance"… while dancing. Makes sense, doesn't it? Something straight out of me and Captain Jack Sparrow's book.**


	29. Chapter 29

Me: I have succeeded in my quest to capture Finn. What? You didn't know he ran away?

Finn: -tied up in chair-

Me: That'll teach you.

Finn: MRG! –tries to move-

Me: NO! –whacks with celery-

Finn: MRR!

Me: SHUT UP. I'm trying to talk. Anywho, I had to chase him over the purple mountains, across the rainbow river, and through the candy mountains.

Charlie the Unicorn: -appears- NO! NO CANDY MOUNTAIN!

–disappears-

Me: -pause- Well that was weird. I didn't know I had him.

Twin Unicorns: -appears- Candy mountain Charlieee, candy mountain!

–disappears-

Me: Oh. Them too. ANYWAY. On with the chapter.

Chapter 29

_Percy POV_

Did I mention how much I hate bear-hounds? I think I have, but we'll just go over the basics. I hate bear-hounds. They're like the stupidest things to ever roam this earth, and I use 'earth' loosely, because they never die. Kat probably thought that we could use them to drive off enemies, but unfortunately, there really was no way the monsters could distinguish enemies from good guys. Especially when there was a colony of them already angry from us attacking. At this rate, I was certain we were going to have to run forever when I heard loud screams in front of us. And they were getting closer.

"What do we do?" Arianna asked frantically. I looked around.

"Climb a tree?" I suggested.

"Wait! I think I know where we are! HELP!" Finn yelled, waving his arms over his head. The screams were louder, sounding like a bunch of girls, and they were carrying lanterns. As we got closer, I could see that it was a group of girls. They were waving their lanterns around and screaming like they were being chased by an axe-murderer. I was thinking they were running to kill us, but they ran right past us and towards the bear-hounds. I turned in astonishment and terror to see the girls being torn apart, but it didn't happen.

"AHHHHHHHHHHHH!" they screamed and the bear-hounds were hissing and snarling and loping around, trying to get past the screaming girls. Then, they turned and ran away. They ran away.

"Thanks…" Arianna said suspiciously. The girls turned towards us.

"Ah, no problem, night-watch was getting boring," the lead girl said. "So who exactly are you?"

"We're from the academy back there," I said, pointing behind us. The girls gasped.

"OMG! They're students! We're sorry Your Majesties! Follow us to the kingdom!" the lead girl said, and they all curtsied.

"Your Majesties?" I muttered.

"I'm Melissa, by the way," the girl said.

"Uh, I'm Finn, that's Percy and this is Arianna." We all waved a bit as he said our names.

"Come inside before it gets cold or the bear-hounds come back." The girls headed off and we followed, reluctant to go anywhere else without our bear-hound protection.

"Where are we, exactly?"

"We're in the fandoms," Finn said to me. Then he frowned. "_BLEEP,_" he said. He looked shocked and turned around.

"What was that?" A voice from nowhere whispered to us: "No cursing. We censor everything with a bleep."

"Oh. I forgot about that," Finn sighed. "I hate fandoms so much."

"What are fandoms, exactly?" Arianna raised her hand as we walked down a cobblestone path and the girls talking excitedly in front of us.

"It's where the fangirls live and rule. Scary creatures."

"A what?" I asked.

"Fangirl. Girls who are absolutely dedicated to a band, artist or whatever and have official fanbases wherever you go. Katycats, Little Monsters… they all live here. I just hope we didn't run into Beliebers. They're scary. They throw all this random stuff at you and it hurts. A lot."

"Katycats? Little Monsters? Beliebers?"

"Katycats are supporters of Katy Perry. Little Monsters are supporters of Lady Gaga and Beliebers support-"

"Justin Bieber," Arianna finished. Finn nodded.

"But they worship us."

"Because of Kat," Finn said. "She established these fandoms here when they were just little villages. When there were more fangirls coming in, they had to expand, thus creating the fandoms."

"How many are there?" I asked.

"I have no idea," Finn admitted. "Um. Directioners, Little Monsters, Katycats, Beliebers, Mahomies…"

"Is he speaking English?" I whispered to Arianna. She shrugged, looking about as confused as I wa.s

"Arianators, Selenators… I think those are the major ones…" Finn said, ticking them off of his fingers. We walked through a huge gateway, leading to a whole city inside of a humongous castle. There were cottages and everyone was talking in a British accent, eating late-night soup with a fork, and walking their cats.

"Um. What's wrong with them?"

"I don't know. I don't even know what this fandom is. Maybe Arianators?"

"Soup without spoons?"

"AHHHH!" a girl nearby screamed when Arianna said 'spoons'.

"What? What did I say?"

"SHE SAID THE WORD! NO!"

"What word?"

"After 'without'," Melissa said gently, now next to us.

"Soup?"

"No. Other word."

"Spoons?" Arianna said after a while. Everyone screamed again. I covered my ears.

"I don't like this place too much," I informed Finn. He shouted back at me, "WHAT?" because he had his ears covered too.

_Finn POV_

I had only visited one fandom, and that was after a hunger strike in the Selenator fandom. They were all pretty nice and didn't scream at the word 'spoons'. I wondered what was up with that. I soon found out when we were walked up to the castle door. The door was opened by two girls brandishing knives, and there was a lavish hall, covered in electric blue carpeting and pictures of turtles and cats occasionally found on various parts of the wall. A girl stepped out of nowhere, dressed in an extravagant gown and a golden crown on her head. She was carrying a leather staff and used it as she walked over to us.

"Who are these peasants?"

"These are students at the Academy, my queen," Melissa said. The girl grinned and clapped her hands.

"Oh what great company! I absolutely adore students!"

"We're just passing through… my queen," Percy said. The girl glanced to him.

"You look like you've seen a ghost. Oh! Do I have something on my face? Mirror!" and a thousand girls whipped out mirrors like they were in their backpocket or something. The girl took one and looked at herself in it.

"I don't think they know where they are. They said… the word out there, Your Highness." The girl frowned and turned around, strutting across the carpet on the other side of the room.

"I do not have many rules here in the Directioner Fandom, but saying that word is a certain 'no'." She sat down in a throne.

"I am Queen Chelsea of the Directioner Fandom. And what brings these students to my halls?"

"We're traveling," I said. Queen Chelsea nodded.

"I doubt my girls would have brought you in if you were just traveling."

"They were being chased by bear-hounds," Melissa said.

"Oh! Those nasty things. Of course, of course. There is a colony nearby, didn't we drive those out?"

"Er, no…"

"Well for Nando's sake, you can't just let bear-hounds attack people willy-nilly!"

"You never gave the order, my queen."

"I thought it was a given. Hunt them down in the morning. I have to discuss things with the travelers. Off you go," she waved her hand. The girls looked around warily and left the room, leaving us with Queen Chelsea, who seemed to have taken quite an interest in us.

Me: Ah fandoms. Did I forget any important ones? We run into Little Monsters and Beliebers in the next chapter, heads up. I got the idea for this when my friend was like: "This Belieber that I see on twitter is disgusting."

Finn: MRGG!

Me: Do you want me to do my homework, Finny? Good point.

**Read and Review? Are you part of a fandom? Tell me, and give me a name and I'll shove you in the chapter somewhere. And did I miss any? I'm certain I did, there are a lot out there. Who knew fangirls screaming could drive away bear-hounds? Sensitive ears, I guess. I created them that way, they have to have some weakness. Gary-Stu monsters… oh that would be hilarious. So perfectly monstrous. Next catchphrase for a book? I think so.**


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